a blind man walks down the street and trips on an unsuspecting curb he scraped his knee

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Roses are gray, Violets are gray, I'm colourblind.

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What's the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson? Neil Armstrong walked on the moon and Michael Jackson appeared in court several times under charges of child molestation

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What has two legs and bleeds a lot? Half a dog.

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What did Marsha say when she ate the apple pie? Nothing. It would be rude for her to talk with her mouth full.

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You know your in Houston when... The highway sign says so.

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There is a mom a dad and a son, they walk into the museum and the dad is in the bathroom.

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See now, that is because you consider yourself my submissive on a both concious and subconcious level, your body and mind wants me to take care of you. I could say it is because I read minds, but why read minds, when I can create them, why read the future, when you can create it. Finally, lets take a look into the word, nerve endings yes? Not nerve endings baby, its called Suggestion. But seriously though, lets put the word nerve endings on top of the word suggestions again there. Nerve endings, did I mention it works on your butt too? You see, usually you would say no, but you do know that now that I am your master, you do and enjoy as I say? See you baby. Moral: "Feel the grove, I control the way you move"

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John: Knock knock Jack: Who's there? John: Whale Jack: I don't know a Whale, go away. John violently rips off Jack's cock in becaus he's sick of his shit.

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Why was the boy scared? Well, his mother had recently taken up Satanical ideals and in an attempt to sacrifice themselves to the Dark Lord, she drove her car off a cliff and into a lake. Now, with his dead mother in the drivers seat, no way to call emergency services, and 300 feet of water between him and the surface, you can see why he'd be scared.

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Tony Soprano walks into a diner

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I started writing poetry the other day: POETR That's coming along nicely.

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Why do the man leave his tv on? He was murdered while he was watching tv

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I once duped this chick with a parrot. Crazy thing wouldn't shut up. The parrot was pretty cool

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Why did Paul let Johnny choke to death? Because Paul had no arms.

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What sound does a dead cat make? Nothing, it's dead.

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Knock Knock Who did that?

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I don't know why.

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A horse walks into the bar. The bartender asks "why the long face" Turns out the horse's family died that evening.

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what do you call a Nice Nazi A Nazi... He's still a Nazi.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Tulips are pink Daisys are white

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Roses are are red Violets are blue I just ate a crockpot!

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Q why did the girl scream A she got hit with an axe

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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