Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue If I Had A Brick I Would Throw It At You

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Mommy how come daddy went to the doctors today? Well sweetie, honestly daddy wanted me to shove things up his ass And I refused to so he went to the doctors so they can do it...

thumb_up thumb_down -17

y r black people noses so big??? A= god had to hold tem somehere to spray paint them

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why doesnt the chicken wear any pants? His pecker is on his head

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

I was going to write about anti-climaxes but then I didn't.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

I took your mother out for a classy steak dinner. I decided not to call her agian because we weren't very compatible and the conversation was very superficial.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Ask me if I'm a cucumber. Are you a cucumber? No.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What's sad about a truck passing behind a duck? A: Behind the Duck were the Ducklings.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Poker? I barely even know her.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

A young man was lost wandering in a field, when he came upon a small house. He knocked on the door and was greeted by a scary southern man with a shotgun in hands. "I'm lost," said the man. "Can you put me up for the night?" "Certainly," the man said, "but on one condition. If you so much as lay a finger on my daughter, I will shoot you with this shotgun." He couldn't have sex with the daughter because he has severe erectile dysfunction.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What the difference between an apple and a pear One of them is red

thumb_up thumb_down -17

(sniff) (sniff) It smells like gross diarrhea in here... (sniff) (sniff) ... Yeah it does

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What's tall black and has curly hair? A black guy

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Q: Why did the little girl fall from the swing? A: Because she didn't have arms. Q2: And why did she fall from the swing again? A2: Because she tried to get on it again.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

why do ducks have webbed feet? to stomp out fires. why do elephants have flat feet? to stomp out the burining ducks.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What's the difference between a gluten free cereal and a regular cereal? One has gluten, and one has no gluten.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What did the cat say to the other cat? Woof.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

i need a pooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

thumb_up thumb_down -17

I need a sidecart on my motorcycle just for my diick

thumb_up thumb_down -17

I was watching Fox news.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Person A: I think your father might be a thief, I'm not sure though. Person B: How come? person A: I cannot find my virginity. Person B: I apologize my dad taught me well.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Q: why are black people good at basketball A: god you racist bastard

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops