A boy called Justin bieber fell down a hole and died

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Was the last joke funny? Because this one isn't.

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What's black and red? I black guy bleeding to death

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Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear. Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair. Fuzzy Wuzzy became cold easily.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped by a giant scorpion

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Lindsay Lohan

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Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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whats the difference between kids and jewish people? kids come home from summer camp

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What did Billy Mays eat for breakfast? nothing, he's dead.

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What did the black man say to the other black man? Nothing, he was recently involved in a terrible car accident which he barely survived but lost the function of speech and was paralysed from the neck downwards. He is constantly in pain and desperately wants someone to kill him but has no way of communicating this so is forced to wait until his natural death.

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What's funnier than a dead baby? A dead baby in a clown suit.

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Why'd the gay man get fired from the sperm bank? He was repeatedly late to work.

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So there is a white guy and a jewish guy walking, they find a penny on the ground who takes it? The white guy because he is in debt.

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whats fat, green and hairy? Nothing I would pleasure myself to.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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[Insert anti-joke here]

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What do you call a black priest? Father, and then whatever his name happens to be.

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If an ugly person got raped. What would that be called? Nothing. It is never gonna happen. Kelvin Yang.

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If Alex Maitland reads this he is gay

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what do you call balls on richards chin? a dick in his mouth

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Light travels faster than sound, thats why people look smart until they talk.

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What's worse than hitting your thumb with a hammer? Getting your spine ripped off

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If Jimmy had 5 apples and his brother had 5 apples then their father would have been married to their mother before they were born.

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Your mother is so fat that I suggest she should pay a visit to the nutritionist so they can work out a dieting plan together to prevent weight-related heart problems in the near future.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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