what did mohammed say to Jesus? nothing they lived in completly different time periods

thumb_up thumb_down +8

four blondes where on their way to disneyworld they see a sign that say disneyworld:left so they turn around wondering where disneyworld went

thumb_up thumb_down +8

There was an English man, an Irish man and a Scottish man. The Welsh man couldn't make it. Again.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What do you call a mexican with a driveable lawnmower? Rather wealthy.. He must have a secure job to pay for a home with a lawn, and a lawnmower.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from ebola

thumb_up thumb_down +8

How do you stop a baby flying 100mph? a shovel

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the chicken cross the road? Against city ordinates, an old woman was keeping chickens in her suburban back yard. One escaped, and there was no where else to go.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the cook put rubber bands in the spaghetti Because he was an asshole

thumb_up thumb_down +8

How come the man could read the directions? Because it was right side up.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Hello! I am Harry Potter, and i will be teaching you pottery today! Yes, call me Mr. Pottery!

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Q: What's grey and rocky? A: A grey rocking hair

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Whats the difference between a dog and a piranha? Their names.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Did you know him? Why the anonymous tip?

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Roses are red, Violets are blue. Some poems rhyme, Some don't.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A german police officer sees a Rabbi. Nothing happens, it's 2011

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Kirstie Alley is soooo fat! How fat is she? Well, she's so fat that she's in grave danger of developing heart disease, and death

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Haikus are easy But sometimes they don't make sense Refrigerator

thumb_up thumb_down +8

If life hands you melons you might be dyslexic

thumb_up thumb_down +8

There are 11 people hanging onto a rope that comes down from an airplane. 10 of them are blonde, and one is a brunette. They all decide that one person should get off because if they don't, the rope will break and everyone will die. No one can decide who should go, so finally the brunette delivers a very touching speech, ending with the words, "I'll get off." The blondes, all moved by the brunette's speech, start clapping. Problem solved.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

So this guy filled with blood, right? This caused his veins to protrude and him to bleed strongly when he cut his wrists with razors later that night- because of his struggle with depression and substance abuse.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What has 2 legs and bleeds a lot? Half a dog

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did the cow say to the butcher? At least I'm not a Jew.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What's red and bad for youur teeth? A brick.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did the fat man say to everyone? Hey everyone! I am i fat man!

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops