What did the alphabetical soup spell for little Bobby? U gOt SUzie prEgnant ....... aGaiN

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In the middle of english class, Little Timmy raised his hand and asked "Can I use the restroom" The english teacher said " I don't know, CAN you?" Little Timmy said "When I was using "can" I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier asking for permission, as opposed to expressing an ability. I thought since you were a teacher you'd know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?

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HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

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A blonde, a brunette and a redhead are all on a deserted island with no food or water. The redhead decides to try and swim to safety, but after a few hours of swimming she becomes to tired to carry on and drowns. After knowing their friend died, the two other women decide that swimming is not a viable option for rescue, so they decide to stay on the island. A few days later a search party rescues them.

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How many Jews can you fit in to a car? Well depending on the car 2-8

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Why couldn't the chicken cross the road? Because it got hit by a Fridge.

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Why did the Cookie Monster go to the Doctor? Because He had an inoperable tumor in his lower intestinal tract.

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Why is the black guy jobless? He's 3 years old.

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Have you tried Ethiopian food? -no -well it's really good

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HEYEEYAHEYAYYAEEAHHAAA

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what do you call people who keep reffering to the holocost , and cancer sufferers on this site? sad and sick individuals

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Sometimes i like to paint myself red and then curl up into a ball and pretend i'm a tomato.

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Q. Why didn't the Hero rescue the princess? A. Because he crunched some numbers, realized the incredible odds against him, and decided against it.

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A man in a car turned left at the end of his road. Then he proceeded .1 miles and turned left again, as his GPS instructed him.

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A man walks into a bar. He realizes that he would need a designated driver if he would want to return home safely. So he then leaves.

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Q: Why does it take three Polacks to change a light bulb? A: Because they're so damn stupid.

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roses are red, violets are blue, sugar is sweet, and so are you.

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? First of all, babies do not have the physical ability or the mental capacity to ever paint a wall, no matter how many of them there are. Second of all, they are dead which probably will not increase their chances of painting said wall.

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why was 14 scared of 15? 7-8-9

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okay so theres this guy.

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why do jews like weed? A) because they are used to being baked.

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What's the difference between Chuck Norris and Bigfoot? Nothing. Their both really hairy.

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hi dave

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Q: How do you make an mail man cry? A: Take his car and run over his family.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops