Q. What is the worlds biggest lie A. I have read and agree to the terms of service ?

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A Muslim walks into a bar, and has a pint of lager because he has chosen to integrate into his host country's culture. He then leaves without incident.

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Why did Adolf Hitler Start WWII and kill millions of Jews? Because he was a poweful dictator

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, STDs are contagious. Careful who you screw!

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What do you call a blonde falling off a cliff? Screwed.

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What happens when an alien touches fire? It gets burnt

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Why does Toby suck! Because he sucks!

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In Opposites Land, you might think the opposite of small is big. But no, it's nail clippers.

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What do you call a bad yo mama joke? your mom

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Your mom is so fat that she turns "One Size Fits All" to "One Size Fits Most"

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What smells like pizza and likes to roll? Pizza rolls.

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how many shit jokes do you need to make before you realize that random does not equal funny? TOO FUCKING MANY

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If 1+1=2, then you must have passed first grade arithmetic.

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telling real jokes on anti-joke is a form of anti jokes

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Q-What happens when you grow tomatoes in Kansas on an odd number year when its an average of 398degrees Kelvin ? A-You eat em

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What did the plane say to the twin towers? Boom

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Oh NOES! She does worry about me! YOU MUST APOLOGIZE! Relax, the body has two sources of happy drugs, one is the sweet calm stuff I am really bad at, and the other comes with adrenaline and stuff, the name of which I do not remember, both are important, but yeah, I am a thrill seeker, and when I do not find them, I make a thrill out of whatever I got, whatever that means.

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Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

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What's the difference between a gluten free cereal and a regular cereal? One has gluten, and one has no gluten.

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Q:What did the kid with no arms or legs get for christmas? A: A bike

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chinga tue madre Ryan

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drew edminstin is a rat

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Whats worst than getting bombed by the russians? The holocaust!

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i have no friends actually now i fell bad ... anybody spare money for the bus ahhhhhhh kill me now

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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