What's big and white and can't climb trees? A mattress

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Why did the little kids call the boy "pornboy" Because he showed gay porn at the bus stop

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What do you say to a man with no legs at a bus stop.. How you getting on.

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How do you unload a truck full of dead babies? With a pitch fork.

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Q: how do you get a live elephant into a refrigerator? A: you buy an industrial sized refrigerator from cost-co and then walk the elephant slowly but surely through the door. Q: how do you get a giraffe in a refrigerator? A: after removing the elephant by means of walking out the door, slice the giraffe into small pieces approx. 1m by 1m by 1m and put those into the refrigerator

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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? Skeletons neither have muscles nor brains to control any muscles and therefor cannot transport themselves across a road or any stretch of land for that matter.

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life is like a penis, short but feels long when it's hard.

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A pigeon walks into a bar. Someone left the door opened.

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A guy walks into a bar, has a drink then leaves.

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Why was the little boy late for school? Because he was hit by a truck.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Peer pressure

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What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the car? Robin, get in the car.

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What do you get when you mix a elephant and a rhino? A nasty tasting smoothie.

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Whats a movie? A moving picture.

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ROSES ARE RED VIOLETS ARE BLUE HERE'S A KNIFE KILL YOURSELF KANE !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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What is brown and smells like sh!t Actual sh!t

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How do you stop a blind kid from walking into oncoming traffic? .................to late!!!!!!!

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knock knock who's there? Dave Dave who? Dave proceeds to break into tears as his grandmother's alzheimers has progressed to the point where she no longer remembers him.

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Why couldn't the kid get in to see the pirate movie? It was rated PG-13, and he was only 11. Plus, he had no money, and his mother didn't want him watching movies like that.

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why did victor have a tube on his neck he was helping james with security

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Why did the boy only have one arm? tigers make terrible pets

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What do you call it when the Doctor goes back in time to meet himself? A pair o' Docs. What do you call it when Shaquille O'Neil goes back in time to meet himself? Shaquille O'Neil can't go back in time.

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A horse walks into a bar and the bar asks "Why the long face?". The horse replies " I am deeply troubled by the anthropomorphic aspects of my existence and the extent to which I am now protected by law."

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why aren't black people real? they are. just because they are less visible at night makes no difference.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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