What do you call a Mad Cow? Dead. Pst, Mr.Cobb if your reading this- Hola.

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osama bin laden is dead

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I make it rain on them hoes, By which I mean I masterbate from my third story patio

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Knock knock Whos there You spelt who's incorrectly You spelt whos incorrectly who ...................

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Why did the man read the terms of service? He had ignored them before, and was forced into a scam where a shady organization took all of his money and possessions. With no other way to provide for his family, the man began selling drugs, which led to several arrests. He has been n prison for 3 years now... His wife has left him for one of the man's close friends

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An atom walks into a bar. Did it grow legs?

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How do you kill a blonde? By irreparably damaging a major organ. The same way you kill anything else.

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Why do Vampires drink your blood? Because the movie maker needed a story

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How do u wake up lady gaga You go into her room and yell at her

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Your Mamma So Fat The Old Thing That Block's Her From Destroying Kid's Party's Is The Front Door

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Asexuals aren't known for f***ing around.

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When life gives you gators, make Gatorade.

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Stick figure says to the artist "Can't you make it any bigger?" Artist:"No, I ran out of lead?"

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What were the pilots' of Malaysia Airlines Missing plane favourite programs? Lost...

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A Christian and an atheist are in a bar. Neither one knows the other's religion and they continue to drink.

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What's the difference between a pizza and a jew? A pizza is an Italian food and a jew is a human that practices the Jewish faith

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue You wouldn't know that Cause you're a dog.

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Can apples get viruses? No, they are a fruit, and fruit cannot get viruses.

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what's worse than a dead baby in the bathtub? if the baby was named Grace.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "why the long face?" The horse replies "my whole family was killed in 911... And I used the money I got from life insurance to get plastic surgery to always have a smile on my face. My doctor botched the surgery, so now my face is elongated. Even for a horse, of course."

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I'm at a payphone. Though I'm out of change so I'm unable to call my girlfriend and break up with her.

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-Knock Knock -Who's there? -George. -George Who? -George Carpenter, Remember? We were in the same class in third grade. -Come on in!

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what do you call a black person who flies a plane? a pilot, you racist

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What do you call a guy named Bob hanging by a string? Plum Bob

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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