Why was Michael Jackson so bad at dancing? Because he had a broken leg.

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Yeah sure, you have "absolutely... ...No... ...Reason..." to... Fucking... use... This... place... at... all... But you seem to be here all the fucking time, what fucking sense does that make? That is not the matter at all fagface! Your fucking goons assaulting me because "I stole one of your aliases?" I was born Nero and will die fucking Nero, not Nerometal, not Nero of Neronism, just Nero your friendly rapist! Yeah Ill give you my fucking social info, so you... and... your... excessive... use... of... this shit... can... send... your ...fucking assholes to finish the job! Listen bitch! I am a writer! And your faggots stabbed off like half of my eyeball! I don't give a damn about this site, I want your fucking assholes to stop seeking me out in person! Hell, give me your social info, so we can "make a fucking settlement" Where I break off your head and shit down your neck!

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why did miles cross the road? Because hes gay

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A man walks into a bar, drinks, then leaves the bar.

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Why don't women bother to have penises? Because they're lazy and they don't care.

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Why did the person get hit by a fridge? They didn't for its physically impossible for most people to throw a normal sized refrigerator.

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A polar bear walks into a bar, sits down, and says, "Can I have a.........................beer?" The bartender asks, "Why the large pause?" The bear responds, "I have a speech impediment"

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Why do migets laught when they run? Because the grass tickles their balls.

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So I said to the man "That's no banana, thats my wife!"

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why didn't the printer work? it was in the toilet.

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A white man walks into a bar. Then he gets a beer.

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What did the white man say to the black man that sneezed? -Bless you.

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I'm not hungry, so when my mon offered me a pear I said to her "No thanks, I'm not hungry". 

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what do you call a small midget? a smidget.

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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How do you learn how to drive? You get in the driver seat

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- Why an Asian crossed the road? - Because he wanted to.

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What did the Jew say to the German? Yes I would like fries with that.

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What did the douche bag get for Christmas?

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a man walked into a bar, sat down and had a drink with his friends.

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Why did the blond cross the road? She needed to get to the shop as she'd run out of milk.

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So these two girls have a cup .

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A black man sees a watch that he want. He then purchases it with his hard earned money.

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Why did the little girl walk into the wall? Because she was blind.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops