69

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A Man visits his Doctor because he is feeling slightly unwell.

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A jew goes to a bar,then wakes up with presents under his candels.

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How are a duck and a bicycle the same? They both have handlebars. Except the duck.

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How do you make a chicken laugh. By showing it how to cross the road

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What has two arms, and two legs but cant walk? A Cripple

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your mama smells so bad she should probably go take a shower.

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Why did the priest molest the small boy? Because he can.

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How do you wake up Lady GaGa? You poke-poke-poker face

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What's black and white, and red all over ? An interracial couple who were both gruesomely decapitated in a freak car accident.

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How do you kill a blonde? well there are several way's in which to kill another human being, infact, the point that she is blonde is rather irrelevant.

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How Long is a Chinese man.

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WOMEN'S RIGHTS

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What is worse than a little girl being raped by an old man? The accidental firing of nuclear weapons at the US and the US responding by launching nuclear missiles at an unknown enemy then assuming that targeting everyone will kill the enemy. Thus bringing an unprecedented and abrupt end to the world, in a cataclysmic nuclear holocaust. Leaving that little girl to be raped by mutated creatures - that survived the mass destruction - and eventually being consumed by those creatures.

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Boy: Hey, guess who likes you. Girl: Who? Boy: NOBODY!!!!!!!!

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a man is found hanging from the ceiling of a barn and there is no chairs or anything to stand on around. his girlfriend goes in to deep depression and kills herself the next week.

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Like my status for a tbh?

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A man runs over a woman wth his car. Whose fault was it? The man because he should be driving on the roads, not in the kitchen.

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Why are all black people considered to be relatively fleet of foot as contrasted to other races? Because their gene pool contains a higher frequency for the traits of low body fat and high proportions of musculature.

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Q:How do you make an accountant cry ? A: You kill his whole family

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Zach Murfitt has a small Willy!

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms or legs

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whats worse than dropping your ice cream down the stairs? dropping your baby down the stairs

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A guy who's father of eight children, married to a wonderful woman for fifty years, he likes pizza and spaghetti, he smokes cigars occasionally, he also exercises : He runs around the block every other day. He's the manager of a pizza shop and he's living in a two-floor house he calls his home... Nothing really funny happens to this guy, but that's got to be the most detailed character background in a joke ever.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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