what do you call a muslim flying a plane 911

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What is the loneliest number to exist? Zero. Except it's not lonely. I'm just saying there are zero lonely numbers. Numbers aren't sentient. They can't feel loneliness.

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Q: Whats big, strong, black, and sexy? A: Your imaginary dick

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Why did the koala fall off the tree? Because it was dead.

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A boy dares his friend to jump off the walking bridge. The boy's friend accepts the dare and jumps. What happens next? The boy brain is splattered on the ground.

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There was a mexican and a african in a car, who was driving? The cop, because both of these men are rapists.

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Why couldn't the kitten drink from its water bowl? Its face was stapled to the floor.

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Why couldn't the baby walk through the door? Babies can't walk

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What did the boy reading a book do? Run into a pole.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have multiple personalities So do I

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Q :What do you call a cow running through a field? A: Bob

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If pro is the opposite of con . Is congress the opposite of progress?

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What do you call a Mexican worked with a sweaty singlet? A Wetback

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I stepped into the bathroom and began to take a shower. Then, I panicked. I was so thirsty, and I did not take the advantage to drink some water before I stepped into the bathroom. But then I realized: "Wow, I am so silly. I am standing under the shower, so I could easily just expedite my washing and drying, exit the bathroom, get dressed, and grab something to drink from the kitchen!" Then I showered quickly and got something to drink.

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I used to love Christmas Until Santa woke me up and told me my dad didn't exist....

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Someone thought that an onion was the only food that made you cry. So I threw a watermelon at his face.

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What did one duck say to the other? "Quack!"

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so the guy @ the asian restaurant ask the waiter why his beverage tastes funny and the asian waiter says "It's likely that you are used to classic coke and they changed the formula"

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theres a fat guy

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What did the ghost say to the bee? BOOBEE

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Once upon a time there was beautiful princess, ONCE!

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whats blue and doesnt like cheese? the sky, i was only messing about the cheese

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three men walked into a bar, the fourth one ducked

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What do you call a chav in a box It depends what kind of a box If it is a coffin you call him dead If he is in a cardboard box you call him homeless It really just depends

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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