A horse walked into a barn...

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How do you kill a blonde? You shoot her.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms or legs

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A horse walks into a bar. "Why the long face?" asked the bartender. "It's genetic." replied the horse, amazed at the man's incapability to understand horses.

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. The first muffin turns to the second and says "it sure is getting hot in here!". The second muffin looks over and responds "this makes no sense - we shouldn't be capable of speech, let alone self-awareness." "We probably should try to get out of here, though."

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why was the boy crying? ... because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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How did the kid drop his ice cream cone? Ans. He got hit by a bus

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What do you call your mother? Mom.

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How did the osprey find the fish? He searched for it.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Warenth Gibson. Warenth Gibson who? Warenth Gibson. What part of that don't you get?

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Why did the cow eat the grass? Only thing he had to eat.

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Three postmodernists walk into a bar. The barman says "What's this, some kind of anti joke?"

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What is the speed limit in front of Liberace's house? 40mph because that portion of the road is curved.

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Why did the girl fall off the swings? She didn't have arms

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What do you call a 30 year old man with a large white van full of kids? A parent carpooling to the soccer game.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Since chickens cannot speak, it is difficult to say.

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The Mets win the World Series

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a child and his father were on a bike ride the child tried to cross a street but was run over by a truck. His father now lives homeless and griefs his dead son.

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Q: What happened to Sally, did she get that cough checked out? A: She died while driving there and got in a 12 car pileup.

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Your Mom.

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"Hey look, mommy! I'm a whale!" (child proceeds to pull a shotgun and create a blowhole in his head)

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Knock knock, Whos there Nig.ger Nig.ger who Fu.ck all nig.gers.

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Q:Why did the rockstar put rollerskates on his rocking chair? A:Because he wanted people to see him rocking and rolling on it.:)

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Why do women wear make-up and perfume? Because they are ugly and they smell bad.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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