Why is Travis so hilarious? ....Trick question hes not.

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Boy: Knock Knock. Man: Who's there? Boy: Doctor. Man: Doctor Who? Boy: Haha! The man then invites the boy into his home, where he gives him a glass of lemonade laced with Ruphalyn. He then proceeds to take off the boy's clothes and rape him. When the boy awakes, the man starts to fear for the police discovering the boy in his home, so he kills the boy and cuts off his limbs and head, and buries the body parts in a hole in his backyard.

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Why couldn't the kitten drink from its water bowl? Its face was stapled to the floor.

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Has anyone seen Stevie Wonder's new car?! Nobody seen it?! He too!

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Why did the girl fall if her bike? -she has no arms

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If a stick is sticky and a bat is batty, what is a mountain? A mountain is rocky. Techinically, 'mountainly' is not an official word.

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What's the difference between a duck? I'm sorry, I was typing too quickly and missed off the end of my sentence. I meant to say "What's the difference between a duck and a goose?" and the answer is that they are entirely different species of waterfowl.

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What do u call fear of Chuck Norris? Logical

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "Shoo! Shoo! Get out! Hey! Who's horse is this? I don't want a horse in my bar!"

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What do you call a Mexican named Chicee? Chicee

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why did the shark cross the road It didn't its a shark

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Q: So why does an Asian guy look at these two black guys and a white woman in the middle? A: Because he wants an oreo cookie.

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On the fifth day of Christmas my true love brought to me Nothing, because we only celebrate one day of Christmas

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Roses are red Violets are blue Sunflowers are yellow Plants come in different colors

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How do you stop a baby from crying? Put it in the microwave

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Why do we have a black president? Because the populace voted and thought him to be an overall better candidate than John McCain.

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? a fsh

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How do you occupy a blonde for a day ? You put her in a round room and tell her to sit in a corner. ... That or you strap a bomb to her, give her a list of twelve billion things to do, and tell her the bomb will explode if she doesn't do everything on the list.

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Why did the casual smoker have terrible teeth? He very rarely brushed them.

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Joey and Haley have sex; what does he say to her the next morning? Happy 6th birthday daughter.

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What's worse than getting full-blown AIDS? Nothing.

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Fred awoke and looked outside. The sun was rising over the fog in the valley below. Birds were singing, and the air smelled of freshly cut grass. THIS was the day, Fred thought, that I'm going to kill my wife and kids.

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a man walks into a bar and dies

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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