What did the atheist say when he was in the church? The eulogy for his best friend.

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How long does it take jimmy hoffa to screw in a light bulb? A: Jimmy Hoffa is dead and incapable of screwing in a light bulb, however if you change the tense of the question to "how long WOULD Jimmy Hoffa HAVE TAKEN to screw in a light bulb" then the approximate answer would be around 1 1/2 minutes if Mr Hoffa had proper dexterity an motor control that was comparable to the average human.

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Oh my god, I'm on fire! Help me, help me, oh God it's everywhere!

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Q: What happened to Sally, did she get that cough checked out? A: She died while driving there and got in a 12 car pileup.

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What gets louder as it gets smaller? A baby in a trash compactor

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Why did Dave buy a playstation? Because he wanted one.

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Whats black, and chrispy inside...? A black guy with bonecancer

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A black man without problems.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

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whats the difference between a chicken and a grape? there both green exept for the chicken

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What do you call a half man half manatee? A manatee

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Q:why did the girl fall off the swing set? A:she had no arms

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Your momma so fat she can eat 10 of your 300lb friends.

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Why did the little girl cry A rabi slapped her and stole her ice cream

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Q: Why is 6 afraid of 7? A: Because 7 rapes people

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Q: why did the boy fall off his bike? A: he wasn't very coordinated

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Have you ever had sex with a woman (or several at once) and suddenly thought somethi... Moral: Nevermind, like you ever had sex! LOL!

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Q. What's large, solid, and full of veins? A. A man or woman who frequently engages in weightlifting and follows a diet primarily based around high protein and low carbohydrate intake

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Why do black people love menthol? Nobody knows.

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What did the guard say to the... I was going to finish this anti-joke but I took an arrow to the knee.

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Women's rights.

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Q. What's green and will kill you if it falls out of a tree A. A pool table

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Did you hear about the fetus who met a clothes hanger? I doubt very much that you did.

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Penis.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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