Your mother is so fat.

if i'm white and you're white, then who took my car keys?

Q: Jeff has 10 cookies, He eats 9. Now what does he have? A: Diabetes, Jeff has diabetes.

Q: Why did Cinderella get cut from the softball team? Q: She ran away from the ball.

What do dead babies and trash both have in common? They're both in my dumpster.

What do you call your mother? Mom.

Why do black people like fried chicken?? Because it was fried

A black kid, an Asian kid, and a Jewish kid walk into a barrier. They are students at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry and they walk straight through the barrier onto Platform 9 3/4.

What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding two worms in your apple.

How many alzheimers patients does it take to change a light bulb? How many? How many alzheimers patients does it take to change a light bulb?

What do you call a mummy that falls into the Nile? Wet

knock knock. who's there? Ida Ida who? Idanno, don't ask me.

what do you do if there is a black person in your front yard? tell him to leave...

How did the leukemia patient die? He was shot in the leg repeatedly until he died of blood loss.

Amedeo Clemente Modigliani was an Italian artist who worked mainly in France. Primarily a figurative artist, he became known for paintings and sculptures in a modern style characterized by mask-like faces and elongation of form. He died in Paris of tubercular meningitis, exacerbated by poverty, overwork, and addiction to alcohol and narcotics.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To escape the horrors of factory farming.

a horse walks in to a bar and the bar tender asks, "why the long face?" The horse doesn't respond because it is a horse and is confused by its surroundings and then gallops out of the bar knocking over a few tables as it makes its escape.

What do you call a 30 year old man with a large white van full of kids? A parent carpooling to the soccer game.

Once upon a time there was a cat named Martin. He died.

What do you call a brunette between two blondes? Susan.

Poop.

What's the difference between a black man and cake? I like cake.

why did the mexican cross the road to get to the other country

After a long day on the movie set, Lindsay Lohan decides to go out to a bar. She gets really drunk and high on drugs and some guy takes her back to her trailer and stuffs her muffin.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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