How do you occupy a blonde for a day ? You put her in a round room and tell her to sit in a corner. ... That or you strap a bomb to her, give her a list of twelve billion things to do, and tell her the bomb will explode if she doesn't do everything on the list.

What do you call a fish with no eyes? a fsh

Your mother is so stupid that it would be politically incorrect and socially unacceptable to make asinine, derogatory comments about her challenges.

Jingle bells, jingle bells, Jingle all the way Oh what fun it is to ride in a poop poop fart turd fart, dildo

Why didn't the man enter the bus driven by a black man ? It wasn't going where the man had to go.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because a random biological stimulus compelled it to.

There are three types of people in this world: The stupid. And the ones that can't count.

why was the boy in his closet? He is hiding because his father beats him because he is gay.

Fred awoke and looked outside. The sun was rising over the fog in the valley below. Birds were singing, and the air smelled of freshly cut grass. THIS was the day, Fred thought, that I'm going to kill my wife and kids.

Your momma's so fat that when she goes to the beach, she feels self-conscious in front of all the other beach-goers.

Walk in to a room and sing "if you're deaf and you know it, clap your hands!"

What has five balls and hates Mexicans? The lottery.

why was the boy crying? ... because he had a frog stapled to his face.

Q)whats pink and fluffy A)pink fluff

Why did the black man fall asleep? because he was tired.

Roses are red Violets are red I stabbed the gardener.

What did one snowman say to the other? Hmm...smells like carrots.

What's the difference between a Porche and a Pile of dead babies? I don't have a Porche in my garage.

Steve, what do I write on a 3946 if more than two vehicles were involved?

2 loaves of bread were in a bar they did nothing as they are inanimate objects

Why do black people like chicken? It's usually fried.

Your mommas so poor she can't afford food for her child. Thats you.

What is the speed limit in front of Liberace's house? 40mph because that portion of the road is curved.

How many babies does it take to fill a ditch? Six if you pack them in really tight.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...