Man 1: youre going to die Man 2: why? Man 1: everyone dies

a: How can you tell you are not pregnant? b: I don’t know. a: Like this: I’m not pregnant.

Why are all black people considered to be relatively fleet of foot as contrasted to other races? Because their gene pool contains a higher frequency for the traits of low body fat and high proportions of musculature.

How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends on how hard you throw them

What's sad about a house on fire?, it was my house.

A rabbi, a nun, and a homosexual walk into a bar. They proceed to get drunk, and party like its 1972. Oh yeah. And your dad was just killed by a refrigerator.

Why did the little boy drop his Icecream? Because I ran him over with my Bus!!

how do you tell a joke on anti-joke? you don't.

A mogwai walks into a bar. The bartender says "Sorry, we don't feed mogwais after midnight."

Knock knock. Who's there? Get in the van, or I'll kill you.

Knock, knock. Who's there? Warenth Gibson. Warenth Gibson who? Warenth Gibson. What part of that don't you get?

Q: What do you get when you cross and owl with a bungie cord? A: My ass

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a bagel.

Why did the pirate say to the donkey? Rrrrrrrrrrr you a donkey?

What do you call a black pilot? Whatever his name is, you racist.

What did he hellen keller say to her dad ? Nothing she cant talk

A man walks into a bar. Itwas an metal bar so the man was hurt.

A skeleton goes to a bar an orders a human flesh.

Q: How many Chuck Norrises does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: negitave 999999999999999999e

Why did Dave buy a playstation? Because he wanted one.

"Doctor, doctor! I think I've got Chlamydia!" "Yes, so you have told me. The urine sample you provided me with last week has come back positive. I'm sorry, sir, but you'll never be able to have children."

A man gets into a joan Battle. He says Lamboguini Mercy your chick so thirsty then his pponent says Shut up Your chick is thirsty beacs yours face looks like a dried orange The man runs away Then the opponent realizes His Girlfrienn just aked Him for some water

Whats black, and chrispy inside...? A black guy with bonecancer

Women are like puzzles. Because prior to 1920 neither had the right to vote. Puzzles still don't

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...