Yesterday I caught my 4year old son shaving, trying to be like his dad. Sadly, he accidently sliced through the main artery supplying blood to his brain and bled to death in my arms.

What's big, red, and eats rocks? A big red rock-eater.

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A jew, a black man, an Irishman, a Scotsman, an Englishman, an American, and a muslim walk into a bar. They discuss their racial, political and religious opinions and walk away after a pleasant evening.

What did the homeless man get for christmas? Nothing

Where did little Annie go after the explosion? Everywhere.

What did the cow say to the farmer? 'Moo.'

What did the ghost say to the bee? BOOBEE

why did the monkey fall out of the tree there was no monkey

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He didn't. He slowly ate it on a warm day although it's taste was somewhat of a disappointment.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, my chickens aren't allowed in rural areas...

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because not only was she deaf and dumb, but she was also blind and it's not possible to drive if you are blind.

The joke below me is retarded

What Do You Call A Japanese Man Humming Classicle Music While Removing Toy Soldiors From His Ear With His Foot Jumping Up And Down On A Large Elephant Strutting About The Universe? Strange.

What did the boy with no legs and no arms get for Christmas? Cancer.

what did the kid say when the bully took his ice cream nothing the bully punched him in the face first.

Do unto others as others would do unto you, said the rapist.

what's white, sticky, and very fluffy? which can be sweet or bitter, depending on what the person ate. THATS RIGHT. it's CUM. :D

Why did German shower heads have eleven holes? Because jews only have ten fingers.

There are 2 muffins sitting in an oven. Neither of the muffins say anything because muffins can't talk.

What is the difference between a Jew and a canoe? A canoe tips.

What did the racist guy say at the baseball game? I am at a baseball game.

Knock Knock! Come in.

i like pie

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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