Knock knock. Who's there? George Washington. George Washington who? George Washington Carver.

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Why is Jesus not real? Because Chuck Norris is still alive.

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Q. What did the man with no heart say? A. Nothing. No living creature can live without a heart.

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How do you lock out a Chinese Person? Lock the door

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What is the difference between your mother and a hooker? Gonorrhea and her father's approval.

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Doesn't matter, the lightbulb was never out

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Why didn't you return my call? Cause I F@%Kin Hate you!...And Just wanted to tell you in person....

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Politics.

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why do giraffes have long necks? because their heads are a long way from their bodies

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"I see" said the blind man to his dead wife

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Why did the cheeseburger have seeds on its buns? Because it wasn't a taco.

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A man walks into a Library and asks for a book on suicide. The Librarian says: "Do you have a library card?" The man says no and applies for one.

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Q:: when artificial intelligence takes over the planet, what will become of anti-joke.com? A:: idk, but my cousin's girlfriend and I will get naked together and she will get on top of me and tell me I'm awesome and that my d*ck feels really good inside her. you see by the time AI takes over, the means to create virtual reality experiences will be greatly enhanced.

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A man was chopping wood, he then brought the wood to his house and lit a fire.

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What did the mexican say to the other mexican? Hola.

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A skeleton walks into a bar. It's inside a person. He orders a beer and enjoys it contentedly.

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How do you keep your dog warm? Put antifreeze in its water dish.

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a rabbi,a priest and minister didnt walk into a bar. Bars are for fun and fun is for not completely insane brainwashed people.

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how much does a pirate pay for an earing? $2.50

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What is the secret to losing weight? Limb Amputation.

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Why did the boy pick up the baseball? He wanted to play baseball.

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Why can't Sally ride her bike? Because Sally is eight months old and doesn't even understand what a bike is.

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What did the homeless man get for christmas? Nothing

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A couple arrived at Hospital in less than 3 hours. but actually they wanted to go to the Church...and 3 hours is quite a long time...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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