What do you call a deer with no eyes? Nothing. I lied about the deer.

whats worse than losing your pet rock? having your dog run over buy a car.

A hayride would be fun.

A Mexican, and Arab and an American are on a plane. The the plane is going down. It hits a mountain and crashes. But there was also a lot of other people on the plane. Families, children, loved ones. It was huge a disaster.

What do you call a dead blond in a closet? A homicide victim.

Woah again Nero, you are so wise... I love you, I really do. If someone can and has already changed the world for the better, its you. No wonder people believe you have superhuman abilities, I used to think so too, but I think I understand what humans can do on another level now, you did that, thank you.

What happens if Pinocchio says "My nose is about to grow." Nothing, Pinocchio was a fictional character created by Walt Disney.

Where do you find your quadriplegic dog? Right where you left it.

Person A: Is your refrigerator running? Person B: Yes Person A: Good! Now, your milk won't spoil.

Did you know Helen Keller had a dog? Neither did she.

"Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "Your mother." "Your mother who?" "Really?"

Why are elephants big, grey and wrinkled? Beacause if they where small, white and smooth, they would be an aspirin!!!

Your mama is so fat she is morbid obese.

What do super heroes say after they beat the villain? Nothing, super heroes are not real.

Your mama is so poor that she is on welfare, but she is ashamed to tell you and cries herself to sleep every night.

What do dead babies and trash both have in common? They're both in my dumpster.

Yah? Well your a ********

what do you do if there is a black person in your front yard? tell him to leave...

A guy walks into a bar, orders a beer, pays, and leaves.

What did hitler say when he spilt coffee all over himself Ow I am burnt

What is white a can't climb up a tree? A fridge.

What's green and has wheels? Grass. I was kidding about the wheels.

A skeleton goes to a bar an orders a human flesh.

Q: what did the hot dog say to the hamburger A: i want your buns

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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