a man runs over his wife, who is at fault? -The man he shouldn't have been driving in the kitchen.

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Why did the student fall asleep during class? He was very tried from staying up too late.

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Why did the cow eat the grass? Only thing he had to eat.

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19 cats 33 hamsters 24 turtles and 23 dogs are all in a small cage, PETA is not happy.

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A guy walks into a bar, orders a beer, pays, and leaves.

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roses red violets blue my name chad i stupid

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Why is Kayne West such a jerk? He has autism.

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How did the leukemia patient die? He was shot in the leg repeatedly until he died of blood loss.

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What did the atheist say when he was in the church? The eulogy for his best friend.

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why did the dead baby cross the road? it was stapled to a chicken

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What's green and has four wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels.

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Why did the pilot crash the plane? It was a tomato.

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Knock Knock, Get the f*ck off my porch

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Why can't women drive? Actually, they can as long as they legally acquire a driver's license and have no existing restrictions.

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I'm getting tired of nazi jokes. ANNE FRANKly I'm quite offended

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A man walks into a bar and slowly draws a pistol and kills 5 people.

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Roses are Red Violets are blue Shut up I'm watching Re-runs of FRIENDS.

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What's funnier than 24? 25.

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whats the difference between a chicken and a grape? there both green exept for the chicken

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That's as gay as AIDS.

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What do homosexual men do during sex? I don't know, but if you want to, I suggest you ask one of them.

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why am i so pretty? because god blessed me with good looks

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A chicken and a triceratops walk into a bar. They both immediately recognize each other and start trading anti-jokes, of which no one else in the bar understood, for they are animals, and animals cannot speak. Which brings up the question of how the triceratops and the chicken would communicate in any way that was conversely accurate to how humans would make jokes. Also adding in the fact that they are both from different eras of time, and the people wonder why a triceratops is walking around when they are in fact extinct. Turns out, the triceratops was an animatronic that gained sentience and ran off the set of Jurassic Park IV, a movie production that was not yet announced, as Steven Spielberg was still working on other movies that were more important at the time. The chicken flew in here because he heard the bar was close-by to where he worked, so he decided to drop by after a long Friday. The bartender finally walks up and asks the triceratops, "What would you like?" The triceratops then went on a rampage and killed everyone inside because he was an alcoholic and lost his family because of it, since his ex-wife would be worked to the bone trying to raise his 2 children and adopted platypus son David. He lost everything in the divorce. Why was he in a bar then? I don't know, I can't talk to dinosaurs. The chicken then befriended the triceratops, as the chicken was a secret anarchist who sought to bring down all the stores on the street, as his mother was killed there while trying to cross the street. She fell into a manhole. The chicken and the triceratops then traded usernames on League of Legends then played out that Friday teaming up and taking down Evil. How do they play League if they're animals? Because this whole story is made up and you wasted a good 2-3 minutes trying to read this.

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How do you evolve a Pikachu into a Raichu? You use a Thunderstone.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops