knock knock who's there? no one... your lonely so you hear things

What is both dead and alive at the same? nothing, thats scientifically impossible you fool

Q: What do you call a hillbilly with 12 girl friends? A: A shepherd.

Past, Present and Future walk into a bar. It was tense...

My friend came out.....of the bathroom so I could shit

Your mother is so stupid that it would be politically incorrect and socially unacceptable to make asinine, derogatory comments about her challenges.

KNOCK KNOCK. who's there? Isdar Isdar who? Isdark in here.

What did the man say to the man? Awkward.

Whats skinny, round, tall, smells like a dead baby, hard, small, and fat? nothing

Why did the cookie go to the hospital? He had cancer.

What did the ghost say to the bee? BOOBEE

A man goes into a library and asks for a book on suicide. The librarian says "I'm worried about your book choice, maybe you should consult a theropast".

girls basketball

What do you get when 100 sex-crazed gays are in the same room? About a quart.

Why did the Booger cross the road? because He was getting picked on....

What did the black person say when his white friend said "Nigga!"? "You know, I really don't get racist jokes like this."

Why did the woman leave the kitchen? To have a shit.

I went to see a fight and all of a sudden a hockey game broke out.

why was the boy crying? ... because he had a frog stapled to his face.

Two muffins are sitting in an oven. The first muffin turns to the second and says "it sure is getting hot in here!". The second muffin looks over and responds "this makes no sense - we shouldn't be capable of speech, let alone self-awareness." "We probably should try to get out of here, though."

What is black and white and red all over? A half eaten zebra carcass.

Where do you find a dog with no legs? Where you last put it.

What did Tarzan say when he took out his knife? I took out my knife.

What is the speed limit in front of Liberace's house? 40mph because that portion of the road is curved.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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