What did the blackman say to the whiteman???? Nothing! They both commintted suicide

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Two guys stopped at a restaurant for coffee. "I'll have a mug of strong coffee," said the first. The second said, " I'll have strong coffee too, but I want a clean mug." The waiter returns and says, "which one of you wants the clean mug?"

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Why did the kid trip over the rock? Because he was diagnosed with serious autism, and might die soon.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? What chicken?

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What does it mean if your tv appears floating away in the dark? You had an awesome tv.

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Q: What the difference between a Porsche and a pile of dead babies A: I don't have a Porsche in my garage

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Q: What did the Goth-Punk girl write on her test for the question "What are three kinds of rock?" A: Igneous, Sedimentary, & Metamorphic, She is a 4.0 Geology Major attending a respectable University. She simply chooses to express herself through the musical and clothing trends that emerged in 1970's English underground music. In reality it her personal preferences in the aforementioned areas have no bearing on her intellectual or academic standing.

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how do you stop a black man from drowning take your foot off his head

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Why did Doris need a hip replacement Because she fell down the stairs

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What did the twin towers order from the pizzeria? Two large Plane

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What's worse than shitting whilst fucking? Losing your eye! Kelvin Yang

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What did the Unicorn do with the Portal gun? Nothing. Neither of them are real.

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Why couldn't Roger become an astronaut? Because Roger's a toaster.

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Two fish were lying on a bank. One said "I can't breath." The other one was dead.

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A man is walking down the street in Chicago. A man in a car pulls up next to him and asks him, "Excuse me sir, how do I get to Carnegie Hall?", at which the man on the street said, "Go straight here, turn onto Birch, follow that to the second stop light, then turn left on Main, big complex, can't miss it." "Thank you!"

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Yo' Mommas so poor, She has to ask close family friends and relatives for money so she can feed you.

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Q: Why did the boy fall off his bicycle? A: Because someone threw a fridge at him.

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What happened when the blonde girl threw a grenade? The enemy pulled the pin and threw it back

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I have to go to the bathroom.

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Why did the boy's house get destroyed? It was bombed.

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how doyou wake up lady gaga youu poke er face

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Not really a anti joke: Superman is flying over town when he suddenly spots a completely naked Spiderwoman moaning and all sweaty while rubbing her her legs, This gets Superman really h0rny but does not want to get caught, so he flies down and bangs away so fast nobody notices a thing a thing and leaves. Spiderwoman: Hey honey whats wrong? Please come lie on top of me again! Invisible Man: AAAAAAARGH!!! IT FEELS LIKE I HAVE A DAMN BOWLING BALL UP MY ASS HOLE!!!

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, My name's Dave, Microwave!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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