What's the hardest part of walking through a pile of dead babies? My penis.

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What's big and white and wilbkill you if it falls from a tree? My dick.

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John is at the movies, when he drops his cookie on the floor. A passer-bier accidentally steps on it as he's about to pick it up. "Sorry" says his man. "I guess that's the way the cookie crumbles" said Terry. The man then proceeds to murder Terry.

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what's the easiest way to tell time? a clock

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What did one liar say to the other liar? I'm very honest.

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how do you crash a party? You dont because that would be rude.

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an elephant is like a guy but its nose is the di**

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why did the man slip on the knife? he wanted to commit suicide

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Why are blondes so dumb? They aren't dumb they just have prejudice against them

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how many babies can fit into a microwave i dont know i havent tried

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Q: What did the Goth-Punk girl write on her test for the question "What are three kinds of rock?" A: Igneous, Sedimentary, & Metamorphic, She is a 4.0 Geology Major attending a respectable University. She simply chooses to express herself through the musical and clothing trends that emerged in 1970's English underground music. In reality it her personal preferences in the aforementioned areas have no bearing on her intellectual or academic standing.

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Why was the man sent to the hospital? He got crushed by a flying refrigerator.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from a fat emo girl with a knife

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Roses are red Violets are black Why is your chest as flat as your back?

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What do you call putting a toad in the microwave? Animal cruelty.

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Knock knock! Knock knock!! Knock knock!!! Knock knock!!!! WHOSE THERE! Wait its a woodpecker

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Whats blue and fuzzy? Blue fuzz. Whats pink and fuzzy? Blue fuzz that's embarrassed.

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"Roll back into the kitchen and imagine me a sandwich!" yelled the abusive husband to his paraplegic wife.

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I was eating a sandwich when someone came up to me and said "sharing is caring" So I gave him a grenade He asked "where's the pin" I said " I pulled it for you" This is not an anti joke

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Why was the protester on the floor? Because the protest had become a riot, and police brutality is a serious issue.

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Why are black people so good at basketball? Hard work and dedication.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I've got a shotgun, Give me the money.

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Knock knock Who's there Police, there's been an accident Oh really? Know i'm actually a serial rapist and i have a gun so open up

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The last joke I tried to submit used "trolololol" as the enter code thing and I spelled it without the extra "lol" The lolz have got me again *this time it asked me for "basket case"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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