Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's blind and deaf, any situation with her in the drivers seat of a car would have serious implications.

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What's fat and round and has a ballsack nose? Mr Chicken

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What did the math teacher get after he ate and he ate? A full stomach.

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If a bunch of midgets do the wave, is it a ripple ?

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Q: Whats more funny than a pile of dead babies? A: The one in the center eating its way out

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Eeny meeny miny mo, Catch a tiger by it's toe, If he hollers let him go, Because if you don't he would attack you and go straight for you're neck and you would die a painful death...

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Why was the girl called stupid? She is mentally retarded...

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What is stupid, black and high? A stupid black kite.

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yo mama's so fat, yo mama's so ugly; your mothers breasts sag with such severity that the late great surrealist artist Salvador Dali mistook them for clocks

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Knock Knock? Who's There? Sgt Constable Ian. Sgt Constable Ian Who? It's Sgt Constable Ian - I'm here to see you about your alleged rape charges.

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Why does Rebecca Black like Friday? Because it's the start of the weekend

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Two men walk into a bar. The third one ducks, as he saw the first two men previously walking into it, and it looks like it rather hurt.

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Whats worse than a joke? This

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Texter 1: Hey, do you want to hang out? Texter 2: Sorry dude, i lost my phone, i'm trying to find it Texter 1: Ok, text me when you find it Texter 2: OK

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How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? It's dependent on many factors, like the size of the babies and the tub. It would be a horrific endeavor, and you should probably stop thinking about such things.

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don't just stand there

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Why did the white girl lose the race? The girl that she was beating was black and her boy shot her. Therefore the black girl won.

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what can jump higher than a tree? anything that can jump because everyone knows that trees cannot jump.

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Three people walk into a bar. Eight people follow them. They all go back to Bob's house, except Anna, Jimmy, and Joe. TImes the amount of people going to Bob's house by four. Thats how many people get arrested at the end of the night. How many people aren't arrested? Do you even know why you read this? Get a life and go to an actual bar, a party and get arrested.

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What's red and green And moves at 300mph A frog in a blender

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What do you do to become a hairdresser? Set Off the fire alarm

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HAVING OTHER LESBIAN'S OVARIES C AUGHT A AROUND U MBRELLAS SITTING TREES

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends how hard you throw them.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme But this one doesn't

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops