What did the prostitute say to the president of the United States? Good morning Mr. President. She had managed to leave the sex industry, finished her education and was doing secretarial work in the White House.

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Why did the black person sit in the back of bus? All the other seats were taken.

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It was a boys birthday, his mom died of cancer, his dad of aids, and all of his siblings were put in a gas chamber. Happy Birthday

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You know what makes me smile? Face muscles.

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender says "why the long face?" He says, "I have acromegaly"

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How did the lazy fat boy burn a lot of calories? He set his fat friend of fire.

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What's the difference between a convertible and a dead baby? One's in my garage, and one's a car.

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Hold on, please hold on! I will explain, it is my name, but I don't know whats so wrong with it at all... Please give me five minutes, I need to use the bathroom, please don't go just yet, don't be mad at me, what have I done wrong now? I mean if you are gonna go to sleep or something please do not be upset with me.

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Knock, Knock. Lol jk, we all know knock knock jokes fricken suck.

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Roses are black, Violets are black, I'm blind.

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so a jewish man walks into a bar. He looks at the bartender and says...this better be free

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Nah really, I start giggling like a dork whenever weird porn or whatever shows up on my computer, its just too weird. Fine ill use my glasses then, thanks for the comment by the way, I was really regretful for sending you that pic, but then again I did not have contacts then, nor did I want to photoshop anything.

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What's the difference between a black guy and a white guy? One has a slightly darker skin complexion

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Your Mum Is So Dumb, It Took Her 2 Hours To Watch 60 Minutes.

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Q: What do you call Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen. A: two things: Their names, and a doctor because they are both in need of a nutritionist.

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Bob Saget

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What do you get when you mix monster, coke, and and seltzer? Kicked out of stop and shop.

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A blonde, a redhead, and a brunette have a contest to see who can get the most likes on their profile pictures. They are all attention-whores.

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What's worse than a dead baby inside a microwave? A microwave inside a dead baby.

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Why is water clear? Because it doesn't have a pigmentation.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? because 7 was a really creepy movie

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Where would canada be without nature? still here

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What did the blind deaf kid get for Christmas? Cancer.

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If the blue man lives in the blue house, and the yellow man lives in the yellow house, who lives in the white house? The blue man. He has made a good living with a high salary and has enough money to afford two houses.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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