Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have Alzheimers, Cheese on toast.

What did the grape say to the bannana? Nothing.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you suck your own dick.

sweating like antoni with a girl

Man walks into a hotel on Friday, Stays for three days and leaves on Friday. How is this possible? A. His horses name was Friday

Q: What happens if you pee on a rock and scraches it on a tree? A: The tree gets wet

why was the Jewish person accused of stealing money? because the police found his finger prints.

What happened to the boy that got raped? He later died of depression

Why was the boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

even a blind squirrel finds a nut every now and then. but has a high probability of getting hit by a car and slowly dying from crushed limbs

1.....2.....3.....boom you died

Your mamma is so fat that she is undergoing strict diet and exercise in order to reduce the risk of premature death due to health complications.

who likes gay porn and has dirty littlesweeneys thathesticks up his hole? Jahn Willems

Why did the chick cross the road? To get to the brothel for hot lesbian love.

An Irishman, a Zimbabwean and a South African walk into a bar... oh wait, it's just the English cricket team.

How many women does it take to unscrew a light bulb? Usually just one, and a ladder.

What is green and drives around in the desert and is not a tank? secretly a tank

what do you give a little girl with no arms no legs and who lives in a orfanidge for christmas?.................................... nothing because no parent wants a freak kid

Q: whats worse than 10 dead babies in 1 trashcan? A: 1 dead baby in 10 trashcans

Why did an old man cause a car accident? He gotf a heart attack.

A guy walks up to a girl and says: " hey can I have your number so can I have your text you later?" she says " no" he says " why ?" she says" guess" He says " look if you don't like me thats okay, " he gets up and walks away, turns out she doesn't have a cell phone, she was gonna give him her house number to call.

Want to hear an urban legend? There's a straight feminist.

A Cheerio is at Cheerio high school, and there is another Cheerio that he wants to ask to the prom, but she is a frosted Cheerio and because of Cheerio social statuses she would not go with him. So he goes to the Cheerio factory so he can become a frosted Cheerio. The factory workers tell him that he can be a frosted Cheerio, but the machines are malfunctioning today and they can only frost half of him. He agrees, and the girl Cheerio goes to the prom with him. He shows up at the prom with her, and she asks him to get her some punch. So, he's walking around, looking for the punch line, when he realizes: There isn't any.

Why didn't the man walk done the stairs? Because he had no legs

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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