What's sad about a pile of dead people? They didn't have life insurance.

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what's the difference between two pieces of bacon and a blond girl? The blond girl is a human and it's against the law to eat her.

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Guys are like a sax. If no sound comes out, you're probably not blowing hard enough.

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What did Harold homeless man get for his Birthday? after several years of a meth abuse Harold lost contact with his family. As a result Harold received nothing but an extra bowl of soup at his local soup kitchen.

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Y did the first squarl fall out of the tree? It died Y did the 2nd squarl fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first Y did the 3rd squarl fall out of the tree? Peer presure. Why did bobby fall off his bike? He got hit by 3 squarls Y did bobby die? He got run over by a truck:)

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Whats black and white and musty? A nuns pussy because it never gets used.

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What do you call a bunch of whiteguys running down a hill? An Avalanche What do you call a bunch of black guys running down a hill? A Mudslide What do you call a bunch of mexicans running down a hill? A Jailbreak

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If an ice cream van goes out of business, who drove the Jeep into the furniture store? To get to the other side.

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What gets you a succesful life and career? Swag

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How many theropists does it take to change a lightbulb? -only one, but it takes a very long time and the lightbulb has to want to change.

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If you play The Binding of Isaac backwards, it's about a boy who summons Satan in hell and ascends multiple floors and eventually revives him mom by sucking in tears. He eventually becomes less of a monster until going back to his home and living hapily with his mother, completely forgetting anything had ever happened.

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A black man is picking cotton in a southern white mans field. This is because the white man is paying a more than fair wage and the black man is a 3rd generation cotton picker who enjoys taking part in his heritage.

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What's the difference between your mom and a table? The table has legs.

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Where does Elmo live? In Sesame Street.

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how do you kill a blonde?? put a scratch n sniff on the bottom of a pool

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

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Why did the frog die? He had AIDS

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Knock knock. Who's there? Imaj. Imaj who? Haha, you're a Jew.

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? He had no arms.

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why did the koala fall out of the tree? it was dead

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If chuck noris has five dollars and you have five dollars, he has more money than you. He forgot about the extra dollar in his back pocket

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Q: What's multicoloured and spins around while screaming in agony? A: A clown in a washing machine.

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I can't hear you. I have carrots in my ears.

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Q. what has one million arms and tells it to people A.a liar

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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