How do you get a cat out of a tree? You throw a rock at it

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What do you tell a woman who claims that she is going to yell "fire" in a crowded movie theater? That doing so could result in serious injuries or even death, and that she would be wise to reconsider her future options, as she could be held responsible for any and all problems that arise.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, This is a Poem, your Adopted

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a rabbi and a priest walk into a wall

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why did scooba steeve loose his flippers? because his head imploded after reaching an extremley high pressure point at the bottom of the ocean. unable to live, his memory was a bit less persistant.

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Knock knock Who's there Done Done who? Done with waiting out here, let me in you dick!

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Have you ever tried grabbing a bottle of 7-up free and walked away with it? Moral: If it says its free, its free ffs!

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Yo momma's so fat that when she asked the doctor, he said she could have such bad cardiovascular problems if yo mamma keep the typical sedentary habits, wich consist in a diet with a lots of fat and sugar, the lack of physical exercise and genetical characterists which make a person get fatter more easily.

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knock knock come in !

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The Piglodocus has been featured in films such as "Jurassic Pork" and "Land before Swine".

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Why did the person name her OC telephone? I have no idea, please let me know why.

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How many babies does it take to paint a fence? depends on how hard you throw them.

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what did the man say to his horse? sex. -teagan doherty

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The feds ruined the first underground, so in order for this to not happen you joined them?

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Why don't black people ever defend themselves on anti jokes? Because black people are slaves.

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What do u call a six year old boy holding a gun. illegal

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I have read and agree to the terms of midget sex service - View Terms of Service

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How do you solve a scatter plot? Give a pencil to Michael J. Fox.

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A Nazi walks into a bar. No one really knows he's a Nazi and he doesn't talk about it that much in public, so he chats to some people then leaves after a few beers...

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whats a porn stars favorite number? 69...

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I took your mother out for a classy steak dinner. I decided not to call her agian because we weren't very compatible and the conversation was very superficial.

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theres a straight guy, a gay guy ,and a jew the weird part is the straight guy hits on the jew and the gay guy which make the situation all akward.

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roses are red violets are blue

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What do fruits and computers have in common. Microsoft.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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