Q: What has 2 eyes and 2 halves of pigs' snout? A: Two pigs peeking around a corner.

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How do you drown in a tea cup? You find a big enough tea cup.

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What did the cow say to the dog? Moo

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Were can you find a bag of meth?

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Joke- Blah Blah Blah, punch line -LOL -Shut the hell up

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What's the difference between a brick and a baby? One is a fundamental item used in building walls and the other is a human

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Whats two plus two Four!

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There once was a man from Nantucket.

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Yo momma is so stupid, she has no job, five kids, and six weeks to live, due to the fact she spent all her money on cigarettes and now has lung cancer.

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What do you call 5 white guys sitting on a bench? An effect of an overcrowded theme park

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Q. What do you call a Widow's Husband? A. Dead...

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Your mother is so fat, she struggles to control her weight even with dieting. Obesity and heart disease runs is in her mother's side of the family; she and everyone close to her is very concerned.

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Roses are red lemons are sour open Your legs and gimme an hour!

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What is white and cannot jump? A refridgerator.

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Q: Who was shot 50 years ago? A: Abraham Lincoln was shot 50 years ago! (=

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A Russian gentleman walks into a bar and requests a vodka which the bartender promptly supplies. Shortly thereafter a Turkish gentleman enters escorting a Llama on a leash and requests a vodka to which the bartender responds: "Your animal is not allowed on the premise, I am going to have to ask you to leave." The Turkish gentleman apologizes for his ignorance of the local customs and excuses himself, and shortly thereafter the Russian finishes his Vodka, pays, and leaves as well.

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-What's long, hard and full of semen? -Since this is a play on words both an erect penis and a naval submarine could apply here

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Why did the angry kid press the button? The button said "press here angry kid"

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Roses r red, Violets r blue, u think id eva cry ova u?? I told u i luvd u, n u believed it true... Well guess wat baby? U got played 2 B)

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Yo mama so fat you have to grease the door frame and hold a twinkie on the other side just to get her through.

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How do you get a baby out of the blender? Pour it

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting eaten alive by midgets with down syndrome

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Why was the jew so happy? He won the lottery which at the time was 3.40 dollars

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Hello, I'm Mark and I have multiple-personality disorder. Don't listen to him, no he doesn't.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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