Why didn't the Orphan finish his lemonade. His legs got chopped off.

Why did the black man cross the road? Because he lived an worked on opposite sides of the road, and so consequently needed to cross the road to work, and provide an income for his family, so they could have fresh food, clean water, and have money to pay the bills such as the mortgage so they didnt become poor and homeless, which would inevitably lead to illness and an early death for them all.

Panda walks into a restaurant with gun ready to eat, shoot and leave to finish a really good grammar joke, but before he can eat, Animal Control tranquilize him and seize his gun. So all he can do is leave unconscious. Meanwhile someone takes enjoyment in slowly burning the dictionary entry for "Panda".

What did the man with cancer say when he got hit in the face with a crowbar? "Ow."

What's worse than Hitler killing six million Jews? All of the Jews. --ZeNaziGermanDoctior

A bar walks into Chuck Norris.

A mouse sniffed a peice of cheese. It was on a mouse trap and then it died in the trap.

Why did the man pee his pants? Because he was paralyzed from the waist down and had no way of feeling

I was sitting in traffic the other day. I was runover.

Why can't Stevie Wonder read? He has retinopathy of prematurity and was born blind.

What do you call it when a plane crashes into a school? A terrible accident.

A man walks into a shop and picks up some items for his party. He walks out of the shop without paying for the items. The police are promptly called and the man receives a 4 year sentence in prison for shoplifting.

Why did the bartender leave the bar? He worked really long hours and finally needed some time to sleep.

What goes in dry and comes out wet Gum

What do a raven and a writing desk have in common? I have no idea.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Your mom.

Why couldn't Timmy go to the bathroom? He was constipated.

Roses are red Violets are blue Sugar is sweet You have pancreatic cancer

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't so much cross the road as he did go down the road, to the supermarket, where he was sold to a family of 5, and taken down yet another road to the family's house, where they enjoyed a nice family dinner.

your mamas so fat she tried to hang herself but the rope broke.

What's funny about anti-jokes? Nothing.

Why did Humpty Dumpty fall off the wall? The wall was unstable and not to be sat on.

Roses are red, Violets are blue Poems don't have to rhyme

I went out back to bury my hoe.. with a hoe..

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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