I walked into the cactus store. The clerk there was being mean so I called him a "prick". ...........

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why did the little boy cross the road? because he had been raped.

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a man walks into a house. he gets shot in the leg and is brought to jail because he was a burglar and was trying to steal the family's tv.

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what has one ear, one leg, one eye, one arm, and is Jewish half a Jew

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How does a man with no arms ride a bicycle? He can't, he loses control and falls over, getting a few scrapes and bruises.

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What's worse then mud on your shoes. Being assassinated by means of a dart to the throat.

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What's the most popular fruit in the U.S.? Bananas What's the most popular vegetable in the U.S.? Stephen Hawking

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Why couldn't the girl call her boyfriend? Because she is homeless and can't afford to buy a phone.

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su algato es en fuego

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Why did the jew ask for $10 back after he lent a boy $2? Because of inflation

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I slept through the Dark Knight movie....turns out I was pretty tired.

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Omar the Magnificent is performing a huge magic show at a theater in New York City. His final trick will be to have his assistant saw him in half in front of the sold out crowd. Omar never knew how other magicians perform the trick. The crowd of hundreds watches Omar's assistant brutally murder him onstage and many require mental therapy for years to come.

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Man 1- What's red, black, and white all over? Man 2- What? Man 1- Half a penguin! Man 2 became seriously disturbed from this joke, as he saw the movie Happy Feet two days ago. He went to intense therapy and became mentally deranged.

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Congratulations, sir. The judge has determined that the charges of traffic violation against you were indeed incorrect, and you will be given a large sum of cash for your wasted time.

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why did the chicken cross the road? IDGAC

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why was the kid laying in the middle of the baseball field? he was shot in the face then mauled by a bear.

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What do you call a person in a morgue? Dead.

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Whats brown and rhymes with Snoop? Dr. Dre

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Roses are red, VIolets are blue, Tulips are white, Sunflowers are yellow

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What do a plum and a bunny have in common? They're both purple. Except the bunny.

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How many babies can you fit on a ferris wheel? None, babies aren't allowed to ride

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Why do dinosaurs have no friends? Because they are all dead

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Why you don't laught when you see a black guy on a scooter? Because it could be your.

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A bus with 12 black guys is driven off a cliff. What is the sad part of this story? ... Our beloved president was not involved.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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