How do you make an egg laugh? You can't. Eggs are inanimate objects which are incapable of emotion, thus laughter.

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An optimistic person says the glass is half full Pessimistic people say the glass is half empty Engineers say the glass is 2 times the size it needs to be.

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What is the diffrence between you and I. I am not sure because i have not meet you yet

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Roses are red. Violets are beer. Kay eckelkamp is in charge here.

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Knock Knock Who is there? The IRS coming to take your house

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What's big, black, and girls love to ride on? A horse

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Kid: Mom I'm gonna dig a hole all the way to China! Mom: That's sweet but it's impossible dear. You'll get to tired after awhile to go any farther. Also, by any chance you did dig really deep, you would melt and die if you got the the center because the magma will kill you when you get to it. Alright son? Kid: What?

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What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear!

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knock knock whos there? your mom really? well whats she wearing a refridgerator.

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Roses are red violets are blue I'm gonna rape you with a stick

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Why couldn't billy hear his mom on the phone? Because Billy is deaf.

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What's the difference between a statue and a real human? The statue can't run if the birds shit on it.

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What´s Green and turns Red at your Finger Tips? Frog in a Blender.

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What's a black mans favorite thing to do Depends on that particular mans likes and interests

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A bison trots into a bar. The bartender says, "My pee makes bubbles in the toilet." Amazed by the urination fact, the bison explodes.

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A wise man once said...... I am a wise man

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so a blonde walks into a bank, opens her purse, pulls out her check and cashes it. She then returns to her car and proceeds home.

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What do you call a black man sitting on a porch? Relaxed.

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What's harder than breaking up with your girlfriend? A stone.

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tim tebow and mark sanchez will lead the jets to the superbowl

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"Knock knock." "Who's there?" "Ben." Ben who?" "Ben Dover!" "Ben,it's been 7 years. I already moved on and have a new husband and family. Stop coming here or I'm calling the police."

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A man says to his wife, "Honey, sex just hasn't been the same lately." "That's probably because of my yeast infection," replies his wife.

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-What do you say to a woman with Two Black eyes?. -Are you really that dumb to leave the kitchen twice -Elder High School

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How do you stop an ice cream headache? Run in front of a bus.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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