"Knock knock" "Who's there?!, who's there?!!!, ya fucking asshole!!!, and quit knockin on my door!, my windows are fine!"

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Knock Knock Who's There? Betty Betty Who Betty Sue Never heard of ya I'm here from the management. You have a present. I don't care, we don't take kindly to you city folks. But Sir, If you don't take this I will have to ask you to leave. Well what is it. It's your bill. Knock knock Who's there? Cowabunga! Cowabunga Who? Moo Moo alalalalalal woohoo i'm so high

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Yo mama's so fat she needed a toilet that had a bigger seat (just like me)

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A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. The bartender says, "What is this? Some kind of joke?"

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How many Jews can you fit inside a car? Legally somewhere between 2 and 9 depending on seat belt availability and passenger space.

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How do you find out a chinese's name? Ask him/her

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Why was the man in a great deal of pain? Because he was hit in the face with a sack of potatoes.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms

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What do you say to a horse at the vet? Good god, look at that ear infection.

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What's worse than sitting through a boring class? Sitting on a bus that a terrorist is about to blow up.

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Science debated on whether Dinosaur hide was like leather But though quite absurd They thought, like a bird Velociraptor was covered in feathers.

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What is the difference between a pig and a crow? One is a animal that Is butchered to be eaten as a wonderful meat product. And the other is a pretentious asshole bird that no one likes.

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Why is 5 the best number? Because it's alive!

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theres no 'I' in 'team' but theres an 'I' in 'hitler'

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Two bees are flying around a flower. "Hey," says one bee, "you ever think about the meaning of all of this? I mean, isn't there more to life than pollinating and satisfying the Queen?" The other bee replies, "No."

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heat!

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If an ice cream van goes out of business, who drove the Jeep into the furniture store? To get to the other side.

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* Why is this dog barking? * Because he's a dog, if he were a cat it would meow.

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Why couldn't the Joker browse the internet? He was using Compuserve.

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Y did the first squarl fall out of the tree? It died Y did the 2nd squarl fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first Y did the 3rd squarl fall out of the tree? Peer presure. Why did bobby fall off his bike? He got hit by 3 squarls Y did bobby die? He got run over by a truck:)

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Where does Elmo live? In Sesame Street.

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Guys are like a sax. If no sound comes out, you're probably not blowing hard enough.

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what's the difference between two pieces of bacon and a blond girl? The blond girl is a human and it's against the law to eat her.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's house? Neither has he.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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