A man walks into a bar and says, "I'll take a drink."

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Roses are blue, Violets are red, I have down syndrome, my favorite color is potato

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What did the one stethoscope say to the other stethoscope? Nothing. Stethoscopes can't talk.

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What did the boy's mother say to her daughter when she walked in on her father having sex with her grandmother? The grandfather said "how are you"? He wasn't a part of that fiasco. However I'm sure that whoever saw what was confused and looking for answers.

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Why did the black man cross the road? Because he lived an worked on opposite sides of the road, and so consequently needed to cross the road to work, and provide an income for his family, so they could have fresh food, clean water, and have money to pay the bills such as the mortgage so they didnt become poor and homeless, which would inevitably lead to illness and an early death for them all.

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A Muslim and 2 French people walked into a bar They start to have a nice conversation about Charlie Hebdo

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Roses Are Red Violits Are Blue Screw it RUN!!

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Why did the police officer decide to eat a donut? Because he was slightly hungry, but a meal seemed too much for him.

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There was a man posting an anti-joke... He had no life

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What do you call someone without legs or arms laying at your front door? Steve

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What's black and white and red all over? Half of a zebra.

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What is the biggest lie ever? "I have read and agreed to the Terms of Use"

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What is black, white, and red all over? A penguin that someone shot with red paintballs.

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What did the Dad say when his daughter murdered everyone Tea you're grounded

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How do you punish Helen Keller You don't, she's dead

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So you are a giggler huh? You ticklish too? Anyway, you ever watched Deathnote? I was gonna ask something kinda important but it disappeared, so you tell me stuff first. Oh, my parents? Well, they where nice and sweet, but lets talk about something cruel and horrible. (If you switch up nice and sweet with cruel and horrible and the opposite, you will get the picture I am trying to pain here) What makes me so much more interesting huh? And why are you afraid you may look like an Alien? HEEEEEY! I am a legal citizen and I am not freaking Mexican!

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He--Hey guys

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A Jew, a Catholic, and an Aeithiest walk into a bar. The bartender look at them and says "Is this some kind of a joke?".

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Knock knock Who's there? Doctor Doctor who? Doctor Adams. You called me about your father's stroke.

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Chris is hairy

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I'm typing this one handed... ... Because I'm an amputee.

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read me write me

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You wanna know something that doesn't exist? Grandma's.........that haven't given BLOW JOBS!

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Q. Where did Little Timmy go for Christmas? A. Auschwitz

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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