Ben has 3 apples and Charlie has 2 apples, how many carrots can fit in my anus? Banana, because cows have 4 legs

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How does a black man get down the stairs? He walks.

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What's red and green And moves at 300mph A frog in a blender

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Why did Stephen Hawking ask for pizza? Because he was hungry.

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friend 1: Alright man, i got your back friend 2: AAAAAAAAAAAUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!

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why was the boy sad? he had a frog stapled to his face

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Your mother is so fat that I would call her quite fat indeed.

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What did Kermit the frog say at Jim Henson's funeral? Nothing.

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Vaginas are like? books. You stick your dick in them.

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What was wrong with the tomato? Nothing.

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Timmy eats 32 cookies and eats 30 of them. What does he have? Type 2 Diabetes.

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Q: whats the difference between a t.v and a dead baby? A: i don't have a t.v in my garage

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What is a good remedy for the common cold? A piping hot bowl of chicken-noodle soup.

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Knock knock Who's there Bill Bill who? Bill Thompson

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I cant find my anti-jokes this is also one

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Ben Corbishley

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hat did the fridge say to the oven your hot baby \

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An owl and a squirrel are sitting in a tree, watching a farmer go by. The owl turns to the squirrel and says nothing, because owls can't talk. The owl then eats the squirrel because it's a bird of prey. Posted by: BerserkSpoon

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A man walks into a bar he's drunk and can't feel it But he's ok

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A girl walks into a bar and the bartender says, "why is your face so tan?" And she replies "I just got back from the beach."

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q. what did batman say to robin before they got in the batmobile a. hey robin get in the bat mobile

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I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

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why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side.

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Your mom is so ugly, she suffers from severe depression and regularly contemplates suicide.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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