Two turtles are in a bathtub. One turtle says to the other turtle "Hey, can you pass the soap". The other turtle says "what do you think I am, a toaster?"

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what does a horny frog say RUBIT RUBIT

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Mr. Krabs lives in bikini bottom (pinch pinch)

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getting a call from the hospital saying that your whole entire family was all killed in an explosion and they were killed from your best friend.

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a jewish guy walks in to a bar says to the bartender says "I have aids" and the jewish man replys "my bad"

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What did Helen Keller name her dog? Well i would imagine one of various names for a domesticated animal and she would choose the name based on her likes towards nature or an element of nature, being the educated individual she i would think she may name it base on a person of importance, such as an author or maybe a writer that inspires her.

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When life hands me beef, I make lemon stew.

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What happens when you mix a platinum blond with a black kid? A young african-american child with un-naturally died hair.

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Q: What's purple and eats desks. A: My dog.

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What's the difference in a big brother and a wee brother? Ones big, ones small.

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Why were our jokes deleted? Because it's anti-joke.

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You having friends.

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why was the cat black it was a black cat

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what did the guy think who woke up with his hands and feet nailed to a barn. IS THIS BECAUSE IM BLACK!

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Roses are blue Violets are buckets this poem makes no sense Washing machines

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What does a shortstop do when the ball is by third base? He leaves the field to go to the hospital, his little sister just had a heart attack.

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So two Penn State administrators walk into a butt.

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Why was the little boys mom watching tv in the living room? Better question why is she out of the kitchen.

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Bob: Your mama's so fat, she rolled over four quarters and made a dollar! Todd: YOur mama's so fat, here's a picture of her tied up in my basement. Todd wins the insult war.

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A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

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Why did the fungus leave the party? Truffle.

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Once, there was an ugly barnacle. He was so ugly that everyone died. The end

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Why is Andrew sleeping? Because he took and overdose on sleeping pills, he probably died in his sleep.

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teacher: what is your name? student: some people call me attractive (mx)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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