What's one thing that bothers EVERYONE? Mother Theresa

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Q:If quizes are, "guizicles," then what are tests? A:Who calls quizes, "quizicles?"

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Q: How do you stop a hijacked plane? A: The plane can't be hijacked because the pilots cabin is not accessable until the plane lands.

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What did the tiger say to the monkey? Nothing really, just a lot of growls and other sounds as he consumed it.

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Do not be unreasonable now, as for the twenty five million dollars, it is the least I can do, but if we cannot agree upon acting with some reason and dignity, as refraining from insults, then no conflict will ever be solved... ...I will send you my contact information shortly, expect the money within the week, three or four days tops.

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There once was a man from Peru, Whose limericks all stopped on line two.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.It got ran over by a bus.

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Why was Timmy sad? He had a frog stapled to his face

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SEX IS LIKE MATH ADD THE BED SUBTRACT THECLOTHES DIVIDE THE LEGS AND PRAY U DONT MULTIPLY!!!!

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How do you get a girls number? Grow some balls and ask for it.

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Why was the little boy sad? He was recently molested.

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Roses are Red Violets are blue I have short term memory loss Hey look thats my bike over there.

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What do you call a fat zombie? Dead

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What is White on Top and Black on bottom? Micheal Jackson.

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My diick won't stop barking unless I take it for a walk, problem is, I can't find a leash big enough

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A man asked a horse "Why such a long face?" The Horse replies "My entire family just died in a plane crash."

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How many Americans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Well thats a stupid question, just one.

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What's worse than a black guy? Two black guys....and a dead white man.

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A man walked into a bar. Ouch.

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Believing in God may be a sign of autism Kappa

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Santa Claus and eight reindeers walk into a bar. “Hey, fatty,” the barman shouts. “Where’s Rudolph?” “He’s dead,” Santa replied. “I’m sorry to hear that,” the barman said, looking embarrassed. “Let me get you a drink.”

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Hai Patrick Hai Patrick

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Most likely for no discernible reason as chickens are animals with poor reasoning skills.

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Rebecca Black walks into a bar. The bartender refuses to serve her because she is not yet 21.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops