Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs going down a mountain? A: As good as dead.

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You wanna know what's totally out of this world? The moon

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three people come to a serial killers house. one was annoying one was immature and one was stupid he would put them all in the same boat. then he towed it into shark infested waters, sunk it and watched them speak their mind. the annoying one said "nah nah nuh boo boo you cant eat me!" the immature one said "im gonna ride one!" and the stupid one said "could you please tell your sharks to stop eating my leg? i need it to swim away from these sharks that are eating my leg." moral of the story: dont go to serial killers homes. they will most likely kill you.

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Two dinosaurs go to a theme park. On the way home they contemplate that they didn't really enjoy themselves. They decide to buy some ice cream to cheer them up a bit. They are severely frustrated by the lack of fun they had for the money they paid. Then they go to sleep. I completely forgot how this joke went, but your mom's a slut.

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A guy walks into a restaurant and sits down only to realize he is not wearing any pants. Immediately the police are called and arrest the man for indecent exposure. Given there were children in the restaurant at the time, the man is also charged as level 3 sex offender and is held on $100,000 bail. His family receives the news and become the talk of the town. His wife commits suicide from embarrassment, leaving her 10 year old son up for adoption who later gets involved with drugs due to his rough childhood.

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What's worse than a baby nailed to a tree? Ten babies nailed to a tree. What's worse than ten babies nailed to a tree? One baby nailed to ten trees.

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I don't have a girlfriend but I do know a girl who would get really mad if she heard me say that.

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How tall is oprah.. 5'7

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If you can't see what I see... You must be blind. If you can see what I see... Well I can't be blind because I have been able to see all my life!

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why do you park in the driveway and drive on the park way

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How do you torture Helen Keller? Give her a cheese-grater and tell her it's a book.

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Q: What's worse than burning your tongue on hot chocolate. A: Getting shanked by a homeless man

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I killed your family, and now i'm coming after you.

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? No. Neither have they.

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Why did Hitler kill six million Jews? Why not? --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

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How do you tick off a Doctor? You cut off his right thumb.

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Why do black people like fried chicken? Because it's delicous.

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what is the name of the book that helen keller wrote LADIUFgSLDGFhalkjgfvcgh

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A black man has 100 problems. on his AP calculus test.

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Why is the chicken on the road? Cuz he died trying to get to the other side.

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What was the last thing that went through the WTC jumper's head? His ankles.

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what goes round , and round , and croaks? a blender in a frog.

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What did the black father get his child for Christmas? A Yo-Yo. Actually, never-mind, he doesn't know his father.

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Why do people go on this site? They have no friends and no lives.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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