Why did the boy miss the toilet when he was peeing? Cause he was in the shower.

An old white lady falls on the ground in the middle of the night. Just then, two positively huge black men in hoodies walk up to her and she is frightened. But as it turned out, they just wanted to help her get on her feet, and called a taxi for her. When she had no money, they gladly paid her fare. This is because they're good people and not muggers

Why did the little boy fall of his bicycle? It was the first time he road without his training wheels.

What's funny and old? I really do'nt know

What happens when you cut a body in half? An erection.

What did Helen Keller name her dog? Well i would imagine one of various names for a domesticated animal and she would choose the name based on her likes towards nature or an element of nature, being the educated individual she i would think she may name it base on a person of importance, such as an author or maybe a writer that inspires her.

Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: b/c it was dead. Q: Why did the second monkey fall out if the tree? A: b/c it was stapled to the first one. Q: Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? A: b/c he thought it was a game. Q: Why did the toaster fall out of the tree? A: The branch snapped. Q: Why did the little girl fall off of her bike? A: She was hit by three monkeys and a toaster :( MAB99

Why did the plane crash The pilot, being an uneducated pilot, crashed the plane as he didn't have proper training, and the whole of the passengers died.

What did one dead baby say to another dead baby? Nothing... they were dead.

What do you call a guy sleeping with little boys? Michael Jackson

What's the difference between a lesbian and a Pringle ? One is a snack cracker, the other is a crack snacker.

Roses are red, and violets are freakin violet. Not blue.

What do you call a dog with no legs? Don't matter what you call him he ain't gonna come.

A man runs into a bar, sits down in a hurry and demands a beer from the bartender. The bartender looks at him wearily, but shrugs, pours him a beer and sets it down in front of him. The fat naked man then drinks the beer and leaves.

What did batman say to robin before getting into the batmobile? Get in the batmobile robin.

the awkward moment when a fat person says they are fat

why was the old man on the ground he fell

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue I have ADD Check out this flashlight!

RECTUM? Damn near spelled "Wrecked Him" the wrong way!

Q: The girl fell for the guy, but the guy was sad about it, why? A: Because she fell off a cliff.

Why did Sara fall off the swing? Sara had no arms! Knock knock? Who's there? Not Sara!

Why did the boy wear glasses? Because he had bad eyesight.

why was sally the best at hid and go seek they couldn't find her body

How do you make a baby cry? You throw bricks at its face.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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