Roses are gay, Violets are gay, I am gay.

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i like your face... HAHAHAHAH just kidding you make me want to projectile vomit.

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Q: What is the difference between a pile of dead babies and a ferrari? A: I don't have a ferari in my garage.

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roses are red violets are blue count my five damn finger , and the third one is for you!!!!!!!!

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whats in a red suit with a white beard and jolly......st.nick jerking of and blowwing a load in your stocking while taking a shit on you coffee table before theen hanging it back up over the fire place

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what happened to the retarded dyslexic? he retard on his 60th birthday and took up gardening.

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What did the kid with cancer get for christmas. Nothing. He was Jewish.

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Hey I Just Met You And This Is Crazy But I Am Pregnant And It's Yhur Baby ~GotDemChoozen

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Knock Knock Who's there? Jim Come on in!

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What's black and white and red all over? A greyish red object.

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Q; what did the gangster say after he and his gang robbed a bank? A;Hey boys lets go drink some soy milk (After that his gang killed him) but the moral of the story is to not rob banks or take drugs

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What do you call two black people on one bike? Unsafe. Regular bicycles are typically not suited for use by two people at once, black or otherwise. Riding on the handlebars is dangerous and can lead to serious injury.

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Why did the man cry when he received his meal at McDonalds? They didn't give him a happy meal.

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What's funnier then the holocaust? A second one.

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Why was the white man chosen for the job over the black guy? He had more work experience and was clearly the better suited applicant.

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Why did the hooker cross the road? Because was a prostitute

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there were three men in a car, Poop, Shut Up, and Manners. They were driving in a truck when poop fell out of the car. Manners went to get him. Shut Up parked somewhere that he wasn't supposed to so the police man came to him. He asked him what his name was and he said "Shut Up" because that was his name. The police man said "Where are your manners?" then Shut Up said,"He went to go scoop up poop".

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What do you call a blonde with great maths skills? A smart person with blonde hair.

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Why did the computer crash? Because it had too much alcohol.

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A Jew, Muslim and Mexican all die of cancer

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A man calls his 23 year old nephew on a Saturday night. He's calling him, in order to apologise for molesting him when he was younger. As he could no longer live with the guilt and shame. They both start to cry on the phone. The nephew hangs up " I can't do this.." The man receives an email from his boss, saying " Lisa told me she's still waiting for your analysis on the new federal cuts and how they're going to affect us. Please send them asap."

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An Asian walks into a Chinese restaurant. Then he decides that he would prefer Mexican instead, and drives to a Taco Bell.

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A man and a midget walk into a bar each carrying a suitcase. They were stopping by after work.

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saw a free cat yesterday...it was dead on the side of the road

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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