Q: How many Jews can fit in a car? A: 5 in a standard mid sized sedan, or 7 in an SUV

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What's black and red, and covers most of your body? Fourth degree burns. You should say your goodbyes.

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Why did man lay down? His dog ate his genitals.

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What did the bus say to the short bus? Heh, you're retarded..

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But I like being mean and angry! Nevermind, 158 according to Mensa`s standard bullshit test (my wife got 160, I remember we argued a lot over it because I kept insisting they would not use the same predictable pattern again... I overestimated them wildly I can make more advanced stuff than they can, and in no way do I consider myself "The worlds elite required to ensue the future survival and salvation of mankind`s finest and fittest" those fucking arrogant suckers,,,) Below average in any test including American presidents and historical events. Aaand about 450 in any bullshit online test which then offers you "more accurate tests" which cost money and probably destroys the fake confidence any idiot buying such a test in the first place might have built up,

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What happens when a girl sticks her head in a birthday cake? She gets a toothpick stuck in her eyebrow. Trust me..I know.

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I wont vouch for anybody right now, but nobody I know would attack anyone, I know I can be overly sensitive at times, but its not fun anymore, stop that.

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What has two legs and bleeds alot? Half a cat!

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Yo mama's so poor that she's living in poverty.

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Whats the same about a jew and firewood? They both burn.

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man, i read a lot but the are some words i can pronounce

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what did john boner say to the hor that was jewing his laundry want to sex my motherss twat?

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Why do fat people make such good slaves? They're too fat and lazy to escape. Unfortunately, if you want your slave to be fat, you actually have to feed it properly.

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I GOT YOUR BUTT PUSSY!

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What do you get when you cross a taco with a a bungee cord? An inedible taco.

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Your Mother

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead get pulled over. The cop says "Yuck!" Then shoots the redhead because red hair is disgusting.

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yo Mama so stupid a robber stole her t.v and she ran after him yelling, YOU FORGOT THE REMOTE!

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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what do you call a cow with no legs? ground BEEF!!!!

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What is worse than finding an apple in you worm? Biting into an apple and finding 2 worms

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Knock Knock Who's there? The police. Open up.

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Billy was so silly that he named his pet zebra Spot.

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I have a friend named Jay . But for short , he likes to be called J .

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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