What do you call a chicken with three eyes? One that flew over the cuckoo's nest.

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What did the first ant say to the second ant? Nothing. Ants are incapable of communicating via speech.

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A man walks into a bar. He is a diabetic and promptly goes into a coma after drinking.

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Hickory Dickory Dock My dog died today.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Seven was black

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Why did little john fall off his bike? Somebody threw microwave oven at him.

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why did the family have dinner? they were hungry and it was 6:00

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What's the difference between a trampoline and a cat? I take mu cleats off when I jump on a trampoline.

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"So, what do you fancy doing tonight?" "Does it matter? We'll end up doing what you want anyway..."

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How do you make a mime talk? There are many ways. I prefer a baseball bat with a nail through it.

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what did one ocean say to the other ocean? Nothing, They just waved.

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Why did the deaf man ask for directions? He didn't as he knew he wouldnt have a clue what they are on about.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, whoever met you is a BIG fool

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Yo mama so fat, that she's even bigger than the universe!

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Two egyptian soccerclubs are playing, what's the score? Over 70 dead

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Why wasn't the black kid allowed in the school? Because it was the Southern United States in the 1930s and due to racial tensions at the time most public facilities were seperated by race.

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WTF? If you look at life from the right, you might just see whats left, and just then I looked down at the midget as he said "Yo whats up?" I told him, hey do you like left? He said! DAAAAAMN RIIIIIGHT! I spent a while just standing there wondering what the hell was happening into my life, it was so right it was left and wrong... NeroMetal (No fucking idea what Neronism is, I just play streetfighter V and type books that confuse people)

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When did the laughter finally die? When you started this joke.

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What makes a subaru a subaru? The fag thats driving it

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why was the woman silent? she lost the ability to speak in a tragic boating accident in which her vocals chords were damaged thus making it incapable for her to utter anything

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How do you know when it's hot outside? When you walk oside and it's hot.

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What's green and brown, and if it fell out of a tree on you it would kill you? A billiard table?

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What's the difference between a ferrari and a penis? I don't have a stash of ferraris in my garage.

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why are black people so good at sports? hard work and dedication

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops