What does a casino have in common with a woman liqur in the front, and poker in the back

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did the chicken cross the road? So it could cause traffic accidents.

thumb_up thumb_down

What happens when you mix mints with fizzy drinks Blast off

thumb_up thumb_down

Why do jews have big noses? Because the air is free!

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Kid hands Lebron a dollar, asks for change Lebron hands him back 4 quarters.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What did the lesbian say to the hot dog? "nice to MEAT you" get it the hot dog is made of meat!

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Student: May i go to the toilet? Teacher: What for? Student: To open the chamber of secrets!

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Your mom's house is so old, that she has rats and other various critters such as spiders, gnats, and mosquitoes.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

How does a woman scare a gynecologist? By pulling human entrails out of her purse when he asks her to provide insurance.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Knock Knock. Whose there? Bond. Bond who? James Bond. na-na NA NA na-na na

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Spilling Dr. Pepper on your carpet

thumb_up thumb_down -2

How do you make a fake baby cry -Put batteries in it. How do you make a real baby cry? -Put batteries in it.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

what did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas? a nintendo wii.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

roses are red, violets are blue i couldnt spend one night without you

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A man walks into a bar and poops his pants. He left because of the embarrassment.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Roses are red Violets are blue Most rhymes rhyme But this one doesnt

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A guy walks up to a girl and says: " hey can I have your number so can I have your text you later?" she says " no" he says " why ?" she says" guess" He says " look if you don't like me thats okay, " he gets up and walks away, turns out she doesn't have a cell phone, she was gonna give him her house number to call.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Patient: Doctor Doctor! Every Time I Drink Some Tea, My Eye Is Really Sore! Doctor: Next Time Take The Spoon Out...

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he (assuming he bears male reproductive organs) saw some corn on the other side (using the light rays refracted primarily by his cornea onto the retina) which is his staple diet as he is a herbivorous chicken. As corn is the producer of the food chain in question and the chicken is the primary consumer, a fox being the secondary and an angry farmer being the tertiary, he needs to ingest this food source in order to obtain the glucose required to produce adenosine triphosphate by the process of aerobic respiration in the mitochondria of his chicken cells. Thus, the chicken crossed the road.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Whats worse than getting raped by a cow? Getting raped by two cows.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A man walks into his cubicle and sits down. After a long day of work, he goes home and happens to die whilst eating dinner.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Wife, "Wake up... i think there's someone in the house, do something... go downstairs and have a look!" Husband, "Do it yourself." Wife, "You what? You can't expect a woman to fight off an intruder..." Husband, "You women wanted equal rights so here you go, do it yourself."

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Roses are Red Violets are Blue Refrigerator

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A frog walks into a bar and the bartender thinks he is very well evolved because frogs don't walk they hop

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops