Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have multiple personality disorder, NO YOU DON'T!

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Why do most married men die before their wives? Men have on average a shorter life expectancy than women.

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So there is a white guy and a jewish guy walking, they find a penny on the ground who takes it? The white guy because he is in debt.

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What's similar between a flamingo and a rhino? They're both pink...except the rhino

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a young mother calf named near reality was milking itself and selling it at pathmark everyday for high prices he got a lot of money out of it and bought a big mansion where he also had a farm and collected prize show cows to show off to all of his cow friends.... he also bought gallons and gallons and gallons and gallons and gallons and gallons and gallons and gallons and gallons and gallons of prize show cow milk to drink to and build up energy for the cow show race coming up in the near fall. Every sunset he buys loads of milk to drink and feed his plants with. He plants lots of grass every day to eat and produce high quality milk goods. He was a wii, ps3, and xbox360 to play everyday and excercise his udder milk.

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Gay jokes are a real pain in the butt.

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What do you call a dead blond in a closet? A homicide victim.

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Do you know what really makes me smile? Facial Muscles.

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What did the African boy get for his Christmas present for the first time? Leprosy

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what is long,hard and holds semen,a submarine , i spelled seamen wrong

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What did the man say to the man? Awkward.

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You are such a loner nothing even clings to you, not even plastic wrap!!

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Diana and victoria

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I came across a woman on the ground and i said what happend and she said... "i tripped"

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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BUT HWY?

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What makes the antijokes on this site funny? Nothing.

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You might be redneck if you are... Indian

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The night is always darkest just before the dawn. Just kidding I'm Helen Keller, everything's always dark.

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'I had a surprise test today.' 'What happened?' 'I was really surprised.'

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Why was the little girl lying on the floor? Because she had no arms or legs.

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What do you get if you put a black man in the blender and then in the microwave ? ... I don't know, that's why I'm asking.

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It was the eve of December and a man was using a blanket why? because it was cold and he wanted to be able to function properly at work so his boss would not get mad at him because he respected his boss and wanted to make him happy

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? Amblyopsidae, or blindfish, commonly found in caves where they are well adapted to life in the dark.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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