you know what they say... hydrate or die

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Womens rights

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Why did Suzy fall off the swing? As Suzy neared the ground while swinging, her foot caught a small hole in the swingset's pebble foundation, and the power of Suzy's momentum along with the sudden stop of Suzy's swing forced Suzy to fly forward off of the swing. Suzy, seeing the silliness of her mistake, laughed it off, and tried to get back up. She quickly realized that her leg had snapped in half. Suzy will never walk again.

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Why did the motorcyclist die? I heard he was sat on by Chuck Norris.

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Thomas Hobbes had a good life Actually he was born prematurely which caused his mother to die, and his alcohallic father left him at a young age to an abusive older brother sucks to suck Hobbes, at least you were smart

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there were 2 sausages in a frying pan. One sausage says it sure is hot in here. The other one says WTF a talking sausage!

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Have you seen stevie wonders house? Nope... Neither has he

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I'm a schizophrenic, And so am I.

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A frog found a smoking cigarette on the road, so he/she takes it, smokes it, and explodes.

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Meanwhile, at La'kaneisha's family reunion, they had a great time eating caviar, steamed lobster, and rare bull testicals.

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Why was the mother crying Her son was killed by a meteor

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A guy with no legs walks into a bar.

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Whats worse then the Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple

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A jew, a black man, a muslim, an atheist, a christian, a catholic, a roman, a russian, a cuban, an english man, a horse, a cow boy, a gay, a lesbian, a dancer, a teacher, a father, a mayor, a politician and a fish are in a bar. Now that's one crowded bar.

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Q. Whats the difference between watermelons and people? A. Watermelons don't smoke pot...

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what looks like a banana, smells like like a banana, but isn't a banana? a fake banana

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How many midgets does it take to screw in a light bulb? One. Midgets are capable of doing an average person's everyday task. Unless they have autism, then they might as well die.

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What is black and white and red all over? A half eaten zebra carcass.

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Why did the boy only have one arm? tigers make terrible pets

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you say "ask me if im a tree" he says "r u a tree?" you say"no..." then just stare at them

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What did Helen Keller say to her eye doctor? Nothing, she is incapable of speech.

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Were do you find a dog with no legs ? Were you left him

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She didn't have any arms.

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Bill is walking down the street when a girl who had a crush on him 20 years ago sees him, goes up to him, and says, "I think I know you, what is your name?". Bill says, "Timmy," and keeps walking because he is an asshole.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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