"Doctor, doctor! I think I've got Chlamydia!" "Yes, so you have told me. The urine sample you provided me with last week has come back positive. I'm sorry, sir, but you'll never be able to have children."

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why did the chicken cross the road? it was in a refrigerated freight truck en-route to its destination.

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What's worse than pushing a baby off a cliff?........ Standing at the bottom with a pitchfork....!

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What do you call a watermelon in Africa? A watermelon.

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Why did the tree fall? I cut it.

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A guy with no legs walks into a bar.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Get in the van, or I'll kill you.

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In Soviet Russia... People were burned alive for refusing communism.

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Why did the plane crash into the mountain? Because it was being piloted by a loaf of bread.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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Roses are red Violets are red I stabbed the gardener.

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Do not believe the sentence below. Believe the sentence above.

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Have you tried Honeybunches of Oats?

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What is the only thing worse than being a smelly Jew in 1944? Being a Jew in 1944 to hit the showers.

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My girlfriend never swallows; she has a rare esophageal disease that's potentially fatal.

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Why do black people like chicken? It's usually fried.

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A suicide bomber enters a bar. Everyone dies.

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What is obama's favorite place to eat? Subway

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I went to a magic show and the magician asked for my watch... He took the watch and then produced a doughnut... Guess what was in the doughnut? JAM!

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Did you hear the one about Helen Keller? Neither did she.

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What's green and looks like a forest? A forest.

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What did one duck say to the other? "Quack!"

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Hey guess what? Nevermind.

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What do you call a black man who flies a plane? A pilot.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops