A chicken and a triceratops walk into a bar. They both immediately recognize each other and start trading anti-jokes, of which no one else in the bar understood, for they are animals, and animals cannot speak. Which brings up the question of how the triceratops and the chicken would communicate in any way that was conversely accurate to how humans would make jokes. Also adding in the fact that they are both from different eras of time, and the people wonder why a triceratops is walking around when they are in fact extinct. Turns out, the triceratops was an animatronic that gained sentience and ran off the set of Jurassic Park IV, a movie production that was not yet announced, as Steven Spielberg was still working on other movies that were more important at the time. The chicken flew in here because he heard the bar was close-by to where he worked, so he decided to drop by after a long Friday. The bartender finally walks up and asks the triceratops, "What would you like?" The triceratops then went on a rampage and killed everyone inside because he was an alcoholic and lost his family because of it, since his ex-wife would be worked to the bone trying to raise his 2 children and adopted platypus son David. He lost everything in the divorce. Why was he in a bar then? I don't know, I can't talk to dinosaurs. The chicken then befriended the triceratops, as the chicken was a secret anarchist who sought to bring down all the stores on the street, as his mother was killed there while trying to cross the street. She fell into a manhole. The chicken and the triceratops then traded usernames on League of Legends then played out that Friday teaming up and taking down Evil. How do they play League if they're animals? Because this whole story is made up and you wasted a good 2-3 minutes trying to read this.

thumb_up thumb_down +80

Your friend is so blonde that when she was born she had no hair but overtime it grew out and became blonde.

thumb_up thumb_down +70

What's a pirate's favorite letter? R, but they are also fond of the C.

thumb_up thumb_down +68

whats worse than losing your pet rock? having your dog run over buy a car.

thumb_up thumb_down +56

A man and his wife are walking home from a lovely evening at the movies when suddenly a masked man jumps from the bushes demanding a pad and pen, his mother just got a new phone number and he suffers from short term memory loss.

thumb_up thumb_down +50

Knock knock whos there? me oh, cool... well come in.

thumb_up thumb_down +48

Want to hear a joke? Justin Bieber

thumb_up thumb_down +46

what did the little girl find when she opened the freezer in her basement? food.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

Animal

thumb_up thumb_down +42

Whats the difference between Michael Jackson and an avacado? Michael Jackson molested a 12 year old boy

thumb_up thumb_down +42

What did the homeless guy do when he found a quarter? He picked it up

thumb_up thumb_down +40

How do you piss off a lion? You repeatedly poke it with a stick.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

What happened to the public server who went to the 5 dollar brothel? He contracted syphilis and died several months later.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Knock, knock Who's there? Who. Who who? ... Who?

thumb_up thumb_down +30

A man and a talking elephant in a waist coat go to a party. The party is actually an intervention for the man because he's on drugs and is ruing his life. The elephant is not real.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Itookasipasoda

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Think about this. I am lying to you right now.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Whats the difference between black and white? nothing,because in art they are just shades.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What do you call 12 ghosts? A bus accident.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What do you give an obese person with diabetes? Insulin.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

A man is having dinner with his family at a restaurant. While eating his food, the father tells the waiter,"This food is delicious! My complements to the Chef." When the waiter comes back to the kitchen he says "You are a very handsome man."

thumb_up thumb_down +14

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What has five balls and hates Mexicans? The lottery.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

why was the boy crying? ... because he had a frog stapled to his face.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops