God said "let there be light" Chuck Noris said "say please

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have multiple personality disorder, NO YOU DON'T!

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "Why the long face?". The horse does not respond because it is a horse. It can neither speak nor understand English. It is confused by its surroundings and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

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What did the baby get for his 1st birthday? Nothing, he was a Harlequin baby, therefore dying during the last stages of pregnancy.

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How do you kill a blonde? Repeatedly stab a knife into her jugular vein

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

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What is the difference between a rose and a grape? They are both purple.

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What are corpses favorite form of entertainment? nothing, there dead.

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Hi Adam,

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I saw a kid watching Harry Potter so I asked him "Do you like Harry Potter?" he replued "yeah" so I asked "do you want to be Harry Potter" he said "yeah"... ...so I killed his parents and locked him in a cupboard.

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What did Lil Jimmi received at his birthday ? A red fire truck and he loved it

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Why was the boy confused? Because somebody had been running around in circles around him and throwing plastic cups at his face.

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Nice legs....What time do they open?

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Why did the baby die? It got shot.

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One day a girl comes home crying to her father. Father, Father! She says, a boy i met touched my shoulder! Like this? Her father says and touches her shoulder. Yes just like that, a bad part was that he kissed me on my lips! Like this? her father says and kisses her on the lips. Yes just like that but the WORST thing was he stuck his you know what into my you know where. Like this? Her father says as he sticks his you know what into her you know where. Yes just like that father but he had AIDS! ......( Awkward silence)..... oh shit.

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Whats worse then the Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple

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What did batman say to robin as he got out of the batmobile? robin, shut the door.

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A hayride would be fun.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead

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minorities

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Why do we have a black president? Because the populace voted and thought him to be an overall better candidate than John McCain.

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartenders says, "why the long face?" The horse doesn't respond because horses do not comprehend English. He then becomes startled by his surroundings and bolts out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

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why couldnt the mexican jump the fence? He broke his leg.

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What looks like dirt, smells like dirt, but isn't dirt? Fake dirt!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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