roses are red violets are indigo

thumb_up thumb_down

How do you get a mexican to do the yard work faster? Offer him a 5% bonus.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did the boy fall off the sky scraper. It was hit by an axe.

thumb_up thumb_down

What color is cotton? White Well in Afrca, they grow black cotton

thumb_up thumb_down

Why was the boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his face.

thumb_up thumb_down

What would Ronald Reagan say if he was alive today? Nice to meet you my name is Ronald Reagan

thumb_up thumb_down

That moment when the worst part of the movie, is when your pregnant wife pees on the couch.....

thumb_up thumb_down

What did one duck say to the other? "Quack" Ducks don't talk. But if it were to say something it would probably mention how it is concerned about the fact that the majority of people on the internet don't know what ducks say to each other.

thumb_up thumb_down

Knock knock. Whos there Time to get a watch

thumb_up thumb_down

A man walks into a bar he said oww when did this metel bar get here

thumb_up thumb_down

Fact: 100% of people who drink alcohol will die.

thumb_up thumb_down

Q. What do you call a black pilot? A. A pilot.

thumb_up thumb_down

What's dark, has an opening, and guys like to go in it. A cave

thumb_up thumb_down

Put my shoes on the wrong feet. Don't matter, i'm gunna die anyway.

thumb_up thumb_down

There are 2 muffins in an oven One of the muffins says to the other 'Jeez it's hot in here' Then the other muffin replied, 'OH MY GOD IT'S A FRICKEN TALKING MUFFIN!!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down

Why is the alien dead as a door-nail? Because the door-nail was never alive nor could it ever be dead therefore the alien must have never existed just like the life and death of the door-nail.

thumb_up thumb_down

There was once a Polish man who was extremely sad with life because people always made fun of him. He decided to do something about it. He sat down to contemplate the situation, and after a few hours, he thought, "I have never seen anyone making fun of Italians. So, if I start talking and behaving like them, no one will be able to make out that I am Polish and make fun of me." He went into isolation for three months and after a lot of practice, he walked confidently into a shop and said, "I am a very hungry. Give me some pepperoni and zucchini." Immediately, the man behind the counter said "Are you Polish?" This guy was taken aback and he repeated his request. The man behind the counter said, "Are you Polish or not?" This man was finally very ashamed and amazed at the shop owner's discerning ability and so he admitted to the fact after which he asked, "But how did you know?" The shopkeeper replied, "My grandmother was Polish. I could tell by your accent."

thumb_up thumb_down

a dumb blond walks into a hair salon and gets her hair died brown... she is now a dumb brunette

thumb_up thumb_down

If you have read this its to late. You have already read this. Im am very sorry.

thumb_up thumb_down

What's the best Anti-Joke ever? I don't know, but it's NOT this one.

thumb_up thumb_down

knock! knock! Whos there? Chris Hansen..

thumb_up thumb_down

Q: What's worse than one dead baby at the bottom of a trash can? A: One dead baby in ten trash cans.

thumb_up thumb_down

You know what's wrong with Oprah? Generally nothing. She's a well-respected African American woman who happens to be quite wealthy and likes to share her wealth with other people.

thumb_up thumb_down

What's did the white man say to the black man? Howdy.

thumb_up thumb_down

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops