There once was a man from Kentuckit, who like to dissapear with his dog and clean up the shit using a plastic bag and put it in the allocated public bin.

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A: Knock, Knock B: Whos there? A: Noone, the door and the visitor are both existential figments of your imagination.

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There were 3 men on a rough each granted one wish to make. The first guy sees a bird and runs and jumps off the ledge and wishes to be a bird and he flies away. The second guy sees a butterfly so he too runs and jumps off the ledge and wishes to be a butterfly and flies away. The third guy telling himself those were all stupid wishes, makes up his mind what he is going to wish for so he runs to the ledge and just after he says "I wish to be" he trips on the ledge and says, "shit!" So his wish was granted and shit he became. The End.

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? No idear.

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Q. The farmer said where's my bucket A. Somewhere

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Why can't dinosaurs talk? Because they're all dead

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because I hit her with a shovel.

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Why did the drunk man puke? Because he was drunk.

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Knock, Knock Whos There, Jews, Jes who, Whould you like some jews with that.

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Johnny fell out of the window. Except he didn't fall I pushed him

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whats worse than the holacost? your mom giving you cubes in your drink when you requested crushed instead

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Whats white and can't climb trees? Yogurt.

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roses are red. vilets are blue. I'm getting hungry. make me some food...bitch.

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'Doctor, doctor, I think I'm a pair of curtains' Doctor prescribes antipsychotics.

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why wasnt nathan invited the party? nathan's been dead for 5 years

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What did Robin say to Justin Beiber? You're gay. Angus L.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue Wait Arent Violets purple?

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Q: what did one guy say to another guy? A: I don't know!

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A horse walks in to a bar. The barman says: "Why the long face?" The horse does not reply because it is a horse and can neither speak nor understand English. The horse is startled by it's surroundings and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables on it's way out.

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So three ants are in a straight line. The first ant said there's an ant behind me, the second ant said there's an ant behind me, and the third ant said there's an ant behind me. Why is this? The third ant lied.

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whats funny? this joke. just kidding. your face.

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Why didn't the plane crash... because of the wight male piloting it

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Find x X + 2 = 5 ^ I found it

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When is a great time to eat chicken fingers? Never Chickens dont have fingers therefore making it misnamed and impossible to eat them

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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