How do you make a blond cry? Rape her and kill her family.

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A man walks into a bar. After recovering, he sues the bar for it's irregular glass doors.

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A man walks into a bar . . . he is tired and thirsty after a long day at work.

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"You know what sucks?" "Vaccuumes?" "You know what metaforically sucks?" "Black holes?" "You know what just isn't cool?" "Lava?"

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What did the horse get for Christmas? Starvation and neglect because its owner has been dead for three months of old age and he was a raging, angry, achoholic so no one cared if hey was dead and/or bothered to see if he was alive

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Yo Momma So Fat!

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Once soon a time there was a boy named steven. He dropped his ice cream because... You know the rest

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My mind is like full of holes so I cannot remember where I am anymore, and I am tired in addition, but say, what the hell is a tussle? Sounds cute, but what is that?

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Why did the elephant not do 9/11? Because he drank a hispanic turtle.

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Why did little Suzan fall of the swing? She has no arms. Knock,Knock Who's there? Not Suzan

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Why did the kid lose his nose? because his brother chopped it off with an axe.

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A drunk guy walks into a car

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hating his life and his job, the man leaves work early and while he is in the elavator he has thoughts about killing himself after returning to his apartment he turns on the TV and grabs his gun out of the drawer. sitting in a chair with a gun to his head he looks at the TV and realizes that his office building has just been hit by a 747 piloted by Al-Quida members. Suddenly the man realizes that maybe he has something to live for and decides not to kill himself.

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Why did the Bruins win against the Flyers? ....they had goal tending.

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What's worse; twelve babies in one trash can or one baby in twelve trash cans?

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have cancer, How 'bout you?

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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sweating like antoni with a girl

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How do you kill a mime? Shoot him in the face.

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pobody's nerfect

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How many plumbers does it take to unscrew a lightbulb? Plumbers don't do that. Electricians do.

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What's worse than a crying baby on a trans-Atlantic flight? A hungry lion on a trans-Atlantic flight.

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Knock Knock I have a f*cking doorbell you asshole

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A guy walks into a bar. No one notices he has epilepsy.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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