A man walks into a bar and the barman says "Why the long face?" And the man replies "I am severely deformed".

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What time is it in China right now? I have no idea, it would depend on when you are reading this. Perhaps you should look at a world clock, watch, or some other sort of time-telling device rather than humorous website. Its purpose is not to tell time. However, there are many other places for this. Good luck surfing the web, friend. I have aided you the best that I can. I only hope that you will find what you are looking for.

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your mommas so fat i like fat cows is she home?

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What was in the magical purple teapot? Two dying pelicans.

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How do you make Bill Gates poor? You take all of his money

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Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

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DERP

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Q: what's green and fluffy? A: green fluff

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What's black and white and red all over? A black, white, and red shirt.

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Q: What did the police officer tell the man without a shirt on? A: Put a shirt on.

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Did you hear about the guy who got run over? Me neither

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Why did Michael Jackson become white? He thought he saw a ghost.

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Q:How do you kill a blonde? A:The same way you kill everyone else.

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a man walks into a bar... he was then shot to death because he was a slave in the early 1800s

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When geese fly in the "V" shape, why is one side longer than the other? There are more geese on that side.

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Q: What's the difference between a polar bear and a washing machine? A: Many things.

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why was the girl raped? she left the kitchen.

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What's long, hard, and in my pants? The SAT's... I lied about it being in my pants.

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I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

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WWII veteran screamed! "You d@mn yellow monkey" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

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What do you call an arabic man who sells bombs for a living? A business man.

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How do you call a black person in KFC? By a Phone.

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Trees are red, FUCK, MY GARDEN IS ON FIRE!

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what do you do with a fat little chug...kick em in the guts

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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